Beneath Still Waters
by fuzzydream archive
Summary: Anna investigates a curious mystery, but she soon finds herself struggling to tell what is real and what is in her mind. Post Series 5.
1. Prologue

**A/N:** I couldn't keep away for long, could I? This is a little prologue for us to start... Promise that Chapter 1 will come soon, so long as you seem interested! This is a very different area for me, venturing into more of a mystery/supernatural story, but it's been fun and I hope you like it too. Rating should change in the next chapter, and by then we'll see our darlings Anna and Bates in a post-S5 setting. This prologue might not seem important now... But it will be, later on, so stay tuned! Let me know your thoughts. :) Thanks Terrie for editing!

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_Beneath Still Waters _by_ fuzzydream_

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_Prologue_

The young woman's blonde hair clung to her sweaty forehead, but her smile was the brightest and her heart the warmest tonight. Her shiny bright eyes looked up at the older woman who was watching her from the foot of the bed. It was slightly warm inside, but it wouldn't do to open the window when such an awful storm cursed the world outside. To this young woman, however, it made no difference.

"Have you decided on a name for her yet?" the older woman asked kindly.

The young woman smiled, cuddling the small baby softly in her arms. Her little girl – she had yet to open her eyes, as she seemed to be a lazy little thing, and of a darling temperament too, as she barely cried when she was born. Instead, the baby yawned contentedly.

"I'm not certain of it," the young woman said, watching as the baby grasped her little finger tightly. "I only really thought of names for a boy. She's my happy surprise."

The older woman chuckled. "She was a surprise for everyone, I'm afraid. But you'll have enough time to find her a proper name," she smiled. "She's such a darling thing to be born in such a tempestuous night. April showers, May flowers, they say. It's looking more like May showers as well," the young woman laughed at the words. "Will you be all right if I leave you for a moment, dear?"

The young woman nodded and smiled radiantly, looking down at the baby once more.

"Mrs Harris?" she asked, not looking away from her daughter. "Does James know?"

The older woman looked at her with kind eyes. "He does, dear."

The young woman looked up. "But he can't come and see us."

It wasn't a question, just a statement. The older woman left, while the baby squirmed in her mother's arms. She was so tiny, and the young woman thought she rather looked a lot like her. Her hair would definitely be fair, it seemed, and her button nose was the sweetest thing she had ever seen. She sighed and looked around the candle lit room – to the small cot just beside the bed, to the book she had been reading this morning.

"We'll be all right," she whispered, but her tone held anxiety. "Just the three of us. We'll be fine."

The rain was the only sound to be heard for a while; indeed, it looked like they would have a rather wet May.

"May," the young woman smiled, and glanced down to her daughter. "It fits you. You'll be my May flower, won't you?"

The baby gurgled. She had a name now.


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N:** So this is our proper first chapter, and I hope you'll enjoy it. Thanks so much for the feedback from the prologue - I really hope this won't disappoint! We have quite a journey ahead of us now. Things are only just starting! I'd love to know your thoughts - any speculation you might want to share, I'll be happy to know about! Let's see if anybody has a clue of where this will go. Thanks so much for reading!

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_Chapter 1_

She had taken to caring for the garden – flowers and small fruits, and it slowly flourished and this pleased her, on her half days or perhaps during a quick escape to the cottage in the afternoons. Even though she had always had her little garden since they moved in, she had never been this devoted before; before, their time off had been spent together as much as they could. Each escape meant some time to be together, however little it was, however simply it was spent. Just the fact that they could be completely by themselves, having a light conversation without worrying about anyone eavesdropping used to be enough for her.

This changed, of course, as many things changed in their married life after that night. When she moved out of the cottage for a few weeks, the garden was left unattended. John had worked on it, but she knew his heart wasn't in it – and for months she had still blamed herself for all the misery that time away caused to them both.

When she moved back home, her secret out, and her husband's open arms welcoming her to the cottage, they both knew their intimacy wouldn't be the same as before. They talked, but it wasn't easy. Their words were careful, the small touches were hesitant, the silence was deafening. Slowly, very slowly, however, it got better. She had taken to working in the garden and he would often bring a chair and watch her work – talking of nothing, commenting on the spring and about the gossip up at the house. The smiles grew as easily as the newly planted flowers did – their joy was harvested along with the small strawberries Anna had cared for. They slowly were becoming one again, as, in a way, they had always been. They were becoming whole again.

Eventually, even the garden stopped being so important. The afternoons spent solely together were back, finally. Not surprisingly, they could be found in bed, rediscovering the intimacy they had fought so long for and exploring new joys in it as well. Her husband's touch was always so adoring, his voice so caring, and she found that her body had never craved for him more than now. Some things would never be forgotten – but she rejoiced in the fact that their new memories could make her go days without thinking of that dreadful time in their lives.

Her solace was no longer the garden, but her husband's arms. And together they managed to make it all better again. They always could. She was certain of it.

Today was her half day, as was usual for Wednesdays, but unfortunately, her husband was unable to share it with her. While normally she would be sad about that, today she felt rather relieved to be alone.

They hadn't even managed to talk much throughout the day so far; his lordship would be going to London in the morning for a few days and John had more work than usual preparing everything. While she dreaded the thought of him being away, and she knew they should make the most of today before he left, she was glad to have a bit of alone time in the garden. John had noticed she was quiet today, something unusual of late, therefore worrying him. She had been perfectly happy and even excited about today when she went to bed last night, but this morning simply took it all away.

Anna sighed as she watered the flowers; they were fully blooming now.

Perhaps she had been too eager to see the signs – she had been late before so that wasn't really unusual. She was tired, she felt sensitive, and her appetite hadn't been great. Now, it seemed rather silly that she jumped to that conclusion so fast and she went to bed thinking about visiting Dr Clarkson today, her mind filled with hopes and dreams.

She couldn't even explain why – they had had many years together, doing nothing to prevent a baby, even though they both wanted to wait for children at first – and nothing ever happened. After a year, she had even resigned herself to the fact that it wasn't for them. Maybe they had waited too long, maybe she was too old – there were so many maybes and right then she decided to focus on her life with her husband instead of worrying. He had told her once – that all he needed was her, that he would be happy until the end of his days with her, and she settled for it too.

It was different now though. _She_ was different now.

Children were often on her mind – she had wished against them once, after the terrible incident, but now that she felt like herself again, that she and her husband were back to enjoying the life that had once been nearly broken, she wished the opposite – she wanted a child. She hadn't said anything to John and she doubted he thought of it now; he probably thought her distance today was part of the healing process she was infinitely in. And perhaps it was, in a way – only directed at something else now.

Anna wanted to be a mother, but it didn't look like she was meant to be one.

She watched Master George and Miss Sybbie daily, and it did not ease her pain; she couldn't help but be reminded that she and John didn't have children of their own to see growing up. She always reminded herself that at least they still had each other, despite everything, and for that she could not envy Lady Mary or Mr Branson.

Still, thoughts of children were becoming hard to contain nowadays; long before they were married she had let herself imagine how their life would be like, perhaps in a hotel, and with a little boy who looked like John and a little girl who looked like her. She wondered which traits of John could be passed to the children, and a bittersweet smile crossed her features; it would do her no good to think about these things. She was happy again, and this would be John's last night before going to London. She should be able to enjoy their little time together without worrying about such nonsense.

Anna started digging the soil, hoping to plant some more herbs right next to the rosemary. She couldn't really understand why the subject of babies was so much in her mind. She had settled on the little family she and John were part of a long time ago; just the two of them, and they needed no one else. It wasn't as if her cycle had never been late, and she had never made much of it. She couldn't understand why it was so important to her now. Perhaps it dawned upon her that time was ticking for her – or perhaps she worried that something changed her body after… After that awful concert night.

She let out a breath that turned out to be a sob, and the tears picked at her eyes until they slid down her cheeks.

Perhaps she was spoiled after all.

She continued with her task, the tears escaping freely now. It was quite useless to wonder and dream now, really – she should just accept that she would never know what their child would be like and look like. Or maybe she could talk to John and see if they could consider some other option, even if that would mean she would never see a little boy with John's eyes and grin. Or a little girl who loved books and literature as much as him. Or-

The scoop she had been using to dig made a somewhat loud noise and Anna frowned, her thoughts interrupted by the hit against something distinctly metallic. She sniffed, digging further and seeing something that resembled a small locket. Brushing off some of the dirt from it, the tears stopped momentarily as she saw a pretty golden locket with a green gemstone adorning it. She imagined it would be quite beautiful once it was clean, but wondered how on earth it got there. She had seen the neighbour's cat in her garden multiple times, unfortunately, and perhaps the feline had mixed the soil or something. She frowned, not being able to brush any of the dirt from the back of the locket. Perhaps there would be something engraved there.

A single rain drop fell onto the locket and Anna looked up, pursing her lips as the clouds gathered more and more. Perhaps it was time to leave the garden be for now; it certainly wasn't being enough of a distraction to her today. Sighing and wiping her cheeks with the back of her clean hand, she stood up and decided to head inside, and perhaps make some tea.

She took the locket with her.

* * *

Anna brushed her hair slowly, her eyes lost somewhere within the mirror. John was talking to her, having just climbed into bed, but she wasn't particularly paying attention. It pained her to think that he would be gone for five days; she gulped as she thought of being by herself, even though she was more than used to it. Nowadays Lady Mary went to London more than his Lordship, though, and she rarely stayed for more than a day. She knew her husband well – he was too talkative this evening, and she knew he suspected there was something wrong with her.

He was trying to distract her, her darling John – his thoughts probably leading him to the obvious, constant trouble that was now not so often occupying her mind. She sighed loudly, resting the comb on the vanity table, her eyes focusing on the locket she had found earlier. She had managed to clean most of it but it still needed some polishing. She imagined it would make a pretty necklace once it was all set.

"Anna?"

Her husband's voice interrupted her reverie and she stood up, catching his gaze as she walked to her side of the bed.

"I'm sorry, darling," she said with a soft smile. John's eyes were worrying over her, she knew. "I must have had my mind elsewhere. What were you saying?"

She climbed into bed beside him, trying to get comfortable as he frowned. He didn't want to have to ask, she knew, but he would all the same.

"You seem distracted today," he commented, his voice cautious. He put the book he had been about to read back on the bedside table. "Did anything happen?"

Anna shook her head at once, perhaps too fast. She laced her fingers together on top of the covers, then chanced a look at him. She took a deep breath.

"I was… I was planning to visit Dr Clarkson this afternoon," she found herself saying, unable to keep anything from him. His lips parted to question her, but she interrupted him before he could even start. "I was… Well, my cycle was late."

"Anna," John turned slightly to face her, "you are saying-"

"No," she said a bit briskly, her heart aching at the sight of hope in his eyes. "No, I was wrong, I… I started my cycle this morning. I just… I thought I might have been," she let her gaze drop to her fingers. "But I was wrong."

"Oh, Anna," John breathed out, stilling the nervous movements of her fingers by covering her hands with his own. She looked at him – he had a small, sad smile on his face. She bit back her tears. "My darling. Come here."

She did, resting her head against the crook of his shoulder and hugging his middle, breathing in his scent. She blinked away her tears but a smile sob left her lungs. His arm went over her shoulders, pulling her closer to him. He kissed her hair and she closed her eyes, sniffing.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry," she just him saying after a moment, and it was then that her tears started to fall. "You know this isn't the end. It can still happen in the future."

"But what if it doesn't?" her voice was small even to her own ears.

"Well, we won't know if we don't try," his voice was playful, and she pulled away just enough to look at his face. She managed a small smile, but it didn't last. His expression turned serious. "You are all that I need, Anna. I have everything that I need right here. If you feel like you need this, I will make it happen. There are other ways, after all."

"You are all that I need," she said resolutely. "I just… I wonder. What would they look like, how stubborn they would be. But I'm afraid I'll never know, because… Maybe we've waited too long. Maybe I'm too old for this."

She rested her head on his shoulder again, feeling calmer now as John's hand caressed her waist softly.

"Please, don't think like that," he told her in a firm voice. "It's not your fault. It could be anything – or perhaps nothing at all."

She sniffed again, this time louder. "Perhaps… Perhaps I am spoiled for this."

His movements stilled at her words, her deepest worry and fear, and he was the one to pull away this time, and she saw a fire in his eyes that she hadn't seem in a while. She pursed her lips, trying not to cry anymore.

"You're not spoiled, Anna," he said in a whisper. "You could never be spoiled. Please don't forget that. All right?"

She nodded a bit reluctantly, not quite convinced yet, but he cradled her face and caressed her cheeks.

"We'll wait a few more months. If nothing happens, we'll discuss our options," John told her softly. "There are plenty of children who need a family and any of them would be so lucky to have you as their mother. But we'll discuss it if the need arises. I just don't want you worrying over this – especially on your own."

"I didn't want to get your hopes up," she whispered. "I couldn't bear to break your heart."

He kissed her forehead. "We can have our hearts broken together. We can manage."

"I know we can," Anna smiled, this time more easily so. She traced the top button of his pyjama shirt. "I love you."

"I love you too," he said softly, so softly, and she just had to close their distance to catch his lips in a chaste kiss. They pulled away and he kissed her temple, embracing her fully now, and a sense of calmness took over her. "Now promise me you won't worry about this. Especially while I'm in London. There's no reason to be worried about this at the moment."

She nodded solemnly. He was right.

"I promise," Anna said. "This was so silly of me."

"Nonsense," John said with a chuckle. "Think of it as something to tell our grandchildren."

She frowned but smiled, and a teasing tone lit her voice. "You sound very sure."

"That's because I am," he kissed her soundly again before she settled against him, the tiredness of the day finally silencing them. She traced invisible circles on his chest and breathed in deeply, enjoying this quiet moment before his short trip, and soon she fell asleep, feeling sure and safe again in his arms.

* * *

"Are you sure you'll be fine?" John asked her quietly as Mr Carson ushered the servants to see to his lordship's parting. They stayed behind purposefully, though they still followed the others.

"Of course. It's not like this hasn't happened before," she told him with a playful look, finding his worry somewhat endearing. She had gone to London with Lady Mary three times in the past months, but this was the first time John would go without her in a long time. If she were honest, she was a bit uneasy about being alone in the cottage for so many days, but she had endured it before and she would again now. She needed to prove to herself that she could do it.

"Yes, but it hasn't happened in well over a year," he said pointedly as they walked into the courtyard. "Please promise me. If you hear anything or feel uneasy-"

"I'll go to Mrs Turner next door or I'll come and spend the night here," Anna interrupted him, stopping abruptly and he did the same.

"And if you could ask somebody to accompany you to the cottage," he added quickly. "You could ask Mr Molesley, or even Thomas."

Anna narrowed her eyes slowly. "John Bates, have you asked them to do such a thing?"

"I may have had a word with Thomas," John exhaled slowly. "I'm just trying to make sure you're protected, even if I'm not here."

"And you asked Thomas to do that for you?" she asked teasingly, but turned serious the next moment. "You shouldn't have, John. Thomas has walked me home on occasion when you were away before anyway. Or does that have anything to do with you as well?"

His grin spoke for itself. "You'll never know."

"Silly beggar," she shook her head. "I'll be fine, so long as you do not forget to write and call when you have the chance."

"I'll write every day and call whenever I can," he promised and she smiled.

"Good," she managed to say before he caught her lips in a soft kiss.

It ended incredibly fast, but Anna smiled all the same. Her hand had found his cheek and she caressed it slightly, trying not to think that she would not be able to do that for five days. They had had a proper goodbye at home, of course, with a much more deserving kiss, but this was what would stick to her mind and she was glad they managed to have this moment before his leaving. She planted another kiss on his lips and giggled when she saw his surprised face.

"That's enough of that, Mrs Bates," he said slowly with a smile on his lips. "We must go, or his lordship will part without me."

"Is it bad that I wouldn't mind that at all?" Anna said as she followed him out.

He merely answered with a grin, and she let out a content sigh, ready to see her husband go. As soon as they arrived and took their place, Lord Grantham came, exchanged goodbyes with his family and John followed him, though not before exchanging a smile with her. She took a deep breath and watched as the car drove them away, and then he was gone. As they left for the back entrance, Mrs Hughes had been quick to talk to her about another matter altogether, and Anna smiled at the older woman's instant try to distract her.

She wasn't particularly worried, but she was already missing her husband very much, that was certain. And she would do as she promised, but first she would try to live life normally before jumping into any conclusions.

She was sure everything would be fine.


	3. Chapter 2

**A/N:** This chapter goes a little M-rated, so you have been warned! And things are starting to happen over here... Let me know your thoughts! Thanks for the reviews so far - they make my day! :)

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_Chapter 2_

Anna read the letter for the second time, a smile erupting on her features as she took in her husband's loving words. It was dated from two days ago but she only got it this morning, just managing to read it after luncheon and only now, within the safe walls of their cottage, she could read it properly. She sighed contentedly, missing John more than ever. Perhaps if he was home now, they would be reading or simply talking about the day's events. Or perhaps they would be engaging in some other interesting activities, she pondered before catching her reflection in the mirror and giggling.

She was glad he would be home tomorrow, finally; she kept busy without him around, perhaps too busy. She took greater care of the garden, read more books than usual and spent more time cleaning than it was deemed necessary. But it had been good, nonetheless; she still checked twice to see if all the windows and doors were locked, and everything had been fine.

She put the letter on her vanity table, catching sight of the newly polished locket she had found a few days ago; she admired the green stone in the middle of it before turning it around, her fingers tracing the pattern that had been engraved in the gold. There were only three letters there – A. C. N. – and she couldn't, for the life of her, remember anyone who had these initials. It was rather old, anyway, so it was either a family heirloom or, as it was most likely, it had been lost and for some reason it ended up buried in her garden. She smiled, thinking it was very pretty, and perhaps John would like it on her.

She put it on then, letting it rest against her skin, and admiring her reflection in the mirror. She looked rather plain and tired at the moment, but her hair was neatly braided and she thought the locket complimented her eyes somewhat. Yes, Anna was pretty certain John would like it. She couldn't very well wear it while at work but in the evenings, maybe, or when they had some time off...

An abrupt noise from the ceiling made Anna gasp loudly and jump on her seat. She looked up, alarmed; a frown appeared on her face as she recalled they had had a few bats up there last year. John would have to take a look when he returned, she mentally noted, standing up slowly and making her way to the bed. Another noise was heard and she sent a scolding look towards the ceiling. She was very glad this would be her last night alone.

She could hear the wind outside and shivered slightly as she climbed into bed, adjusting the covers around her body and sighing as she finally got comfortable. She fleetingly thought that if John was here he would be keeping her warm instead of the sheets, but she would make the most of it tomorrow, once he got home. The neighbour's dog barked, but Anna was far too used to it to mind. Her eyes closed on their own accord.

She woke up in a cold sweat hours later; her eyes opened at once, and she struggled to breathe for a moment. She couldn't recall what the dream was about, but she could still hear the distinct sound of a baby crying echoing in her ears. She shivered; it sounded so real, even now. She rested a hand against her forehead and took a deep breath, doing her best to remember the dream – she was running after someone. Someone with a baby. But it was all a blur.

Shaking her head, Anna looked at the small clock on John's bedside table and let out a tired sigh when she realised it was nearly time to get up. And the sooner she did so the sooner she would get to the Abbey and see John. Pushing the odd dream to the back of her mind, she left the bed and got ready to start the day.

She was walking down the stairs, nearly ready to go, as she had decided against having breakfast at home – it did not make much sense without John there. Mr Chirk's dog simply would not stop barking and she was sure he must have woken the whole neighbourhood. She had even checked outside to see if there was anyone disturbing the poor dog, but it seemed like he was just in a bad mood. Anna looked out over the fields but they were empty. Trying to avoid a headache so early in the morning, she left the cottage with a pensive look on her face, her thoughts going back to her odd dream – she could vaguely remember the cottage too, if she thought about it. Nevertheless, why would she go after someone with a baby? It made no sense. But dreams rarely made any sense.

She walked on, looking forward to seeing her husband again after so many days and already feeling the familiar flutter in her stomach because of this. The cottage slowly disappeared from her view, and a smile was fixed on her face.

She had failed to see a figure watching her from the fields.

* * *

Anna smiled nervously as she took in her reflection on the mirror; she could only hope her husband would like it. It wasn't often that she initiated intimacy these days, though those occasions were slowly becoming more common in their married life and she loved it. Tonight, her body craved him just as much as her soul. She decided to leave her hair loose – just the way she knew he liked it – and put on her newly bought light green nightgown, one she had purchased on her last trip to York on her half day off. She supposed it was fairly risqué, adorned with simple but well craft lace and quite short – it barely covered her upper thighs, but she had a feeling her husband would enjoy it.

She walked towards her vanity table, combing her hair once more until she was satisfied with it and her eyes focused on the locket. She took hold of it before slipping the chain around her neck and clasping it together – it did look quite nice with the nightgown, as it stopped just where the gown's neckline started, which was low as it was. Anna traced her fingers over it with a smile – which only became brighter when she heard the door closing downstairs and the familiar and sweet sound of her husband's cane against the floor.

"Anna?" his voice was not too loud – he might have thought she was asleep already, though it was unlikely. He sounded almost anxious, perhaps concerned and eager to see if she had made it home safe and sound – while they usually waited for each other before going home, she had decided to prepare this little surprise in advance today and she took full advantage of the fact that Lady Mary had retired earlier than his lordship.

"Upstairs," she called to him, stroking her hair slightly, "in the bedroom."

She moved quickly, picking up a candle and lighting the others with that one, hoping to be able to get the bedroom lit up enough before John got there. She had just lit the last candle, on her bedside table, when the door slowly opened and she held her breath, waiting to see her husband's reaction. He looked around the room with a frown, and had opened his mouth to say something, but stopped in mid-action as his eyes focused on her. Anna couldn't help but giggle at his reaction, slowly making her way to him.

"Surprise, Mr Bates," she said slowly as she walked around the bed.

He had managed to take a few steps towards her, and his hands were quick to reach for her, stroking her arms softly. Anna shivered.

"What's this for?" John asked with a smile, his eyes roaming her body.

"I've missed you," she answered simply, standing on her tiptoes to kiss the corner of his mouth slowly, too slowly.

His hands made their way to her shoulders, her neck and her cheeks as he pulled her towards him, and she melted under his touch, succumbing to his kiss. It wasn't long before his hands reached for her hair, and she let out a groan of approval as his touch made her relax almost immediately. She started to unbutton his waistcoat – thankfully, he had taken his jacket off downstairs, though it was most likely draped across a chair, exactly where it shouldn't be, but she didn't think about this for long. He nuzzled her neck just as she was pushing his shirt off his shoulders, and she giggled and interrupted her actions to put her hands on his naked chest, trying to push him away as he knew very well that she was particularly ticklish whenever he did that to her neck – whilst at the same time the familiar stirring began to build up in her body.

"John!" she exclaimed between giggles as he finally pulled away from her. His hair was already unkempt and he had a happy grin on his face – Anna pursed her lips, trying to contain her smile but failing to do so. "You silly beggar."

Her husband leaned down to kiss her lips in response, and her arms pulled him closer to her. After a moment she tried to push his shirt over his shoulders again, and this time he helped her.

"Yes, but I am your silly beggar," he answered with a grin. He held her in place, stroking her waist through the thin fabric of the nightgown. "I've missed you so much," he gave her a chaste kiss on her lips. His hands left her waist to cup her cheeks. "You look beautiful. You _are_ beautiful," he kissed her once more, deeper this time. She closed her eyes and savoured the taste of him, moaning when he pulled away again. He chuckled and his hands went back to her waist, down to her hips. "Is this new?"

She hummed her response into his ear, sucking at his earlobe and delighting in the groan he let out.

"Do you like it?" she asked him slowly, though with a hint of uncertainty. Their eyes locked.

"I love it," he did not hesitate, just as he brought one of his hands to her necklace before nuzzling her neck again. "My naughty girl."

She giggled, partly at his words and partly at his ministrations, and sighed contently as he began to trail kisses along her jaw and neck. It felt quite wonderful to be able to be with him like this again, and she would never take it for granted. Her breathing gradually became quicker, and so did his, as his hands roamed everywhere. She managed to take his trousers off just as he sat on bed, cursing slightly as the clothing she had just unbuttoned found an obstacle with his shoes on. She stood in front of him, in between his legs as he quickly discarded his shoes, socks and trousers and held her in place, his hands on her legs. Anna ran her fingers through his soft hair, smiling at him just as his hands ran up her bare legs. They stopped quite suddenly and he grinned.

"I haven't seen this in a while," John said as he traced the material of the garter.

Anna rested her hands on his shoulders. "Just for special occasions."

His hands played with the hem of her nightgown, tugging it slightly. "And this is special?"

"Of course," she helped him get her out of the gown, leaving her only with her bloomers on. His hands immediately cupped her breasts and she bit down a moan. "You're home. Do you not think this is special?"

John looked mildly annoyed at her question, looking up at her as a smile broke into his face.

"Any moment with you is special," he said in a raw tone, and she gulped loudly, her emotions getting away with her for the moment. She couldn't resist kissing his lips again, feeling his tongue against hers and melting under his touch. It wasn't long until she was straddling his lap, feeling his open-mouthed kisses on her collarbone, and not much was spoken after that.

Somewhere along the way his underpants were discarded, and soon she was only wearing the necklace, the garter and her wedding ring – there wasn't much time for teasing as their urgency in being together after some time separated took the best of them. John was quick to flip her onto her back, eliciting a shriek from her, and she knew he had worried for a moment that she hadn't taken it so well until she started giggling and kissing him again. He parted her legs then and slid into her. Her hips came up to meet his every thrust, slowly at first before finding their own rhythm. God, how she missed him. She cried out as he moved inside of her, letting him fill her again and again, and it wasn't long until her body tightened around him and she let go of any sense of reality there ever was.

He was home, and so was she.

* * *

Anna huffed in frustration, being unable to fall back to sleep. It was unnerving, really, how every time she was nearly drifted off she heard a new noise. This was much worse than it had been two nights ago, and not even John's inviting arms were enough to lull her back to her dreams. When it wasn't the bats on the attic, John's growing snores seemed to frustrate her. She turned, lying on her back, and rubbed her eyes. She would be very tired in the morning, she was sure of it. With a sigh, she decided to go downstairs to warm up some milk. Perhaps it would make her sleepy enough.

John barely moved as she left the bed, and she had to shake her head at that; while every now and then he was plagued by insomnia, whenever he actually managed to sleep he was just dead to the world. The floor was cold against her feet and she shivered as she put her slippers on, making her way silently down the steps. When she got downstairs, she lit up a candle and took it to kitchen. She was slightly angry at not having heard one single noise since getting up, but now it didn't really matter.

She stifled a yawn as she put a bit of milk in the pan and turned on the stove. Peeking through the curtain of the tiny kitchen window, it looked quite windy outside. They might have a storm coming. Her eyes spotted the biscuit jar on the counter, and she decided just a little one wouldn't hurt. She wasn't hungry, really, but she did love the chocolate biscuits she had made while John was away, and he was always saying she needed to eat more. Anna usually rolled her eyes at him; she was eating just enough, but she knew she hadn't really got back the weight she had lost last year, after everything.

She grabbed a cup and poured the now warm milk in it, and stole another biscuit from the jar. The cottage was very silent around her; she could just hear John's light snores from here. It seemed that the bats were set on bothering only her, after all. She sighed, looking outside for no particular reason. The clouds did look rather nasty. She brought the cup to her lips and blew the steam away, just as a lightning cut the sky and something caught her eye outside. Anna froze on the spot.

There was someone outside, in their garden.

The clap of loud thunder made her jump, and her heart was beating fast against her chest. Why would anyone be there? A burglar, maybe – she had personally checked all the doors before going to bed but now she felt very vulnerable. What if someone broke in? What if someone broke in while they were sleeping? Breathing was suddenly hard for her now. She should go call John, tell him what she had seen, but then he would want to go outside and check.

"Anna?" his voice startled her and she turned around alarmingly. The moment he saw her face, the sleepiness was gone and he was worried. "What is it? What's the matter?"

"It's nothing," she said instantly, feeling relieved that he was here, but her tone betrayed her. John stepped closer and took the cup from her hands – she had even forgotten she was holding it, and she noticed some milk had spilled onto her hands and on the floor. "I'm sorry, I… I think I saw someone outside."

The words left her in a hurry, and John had just been cleaning her hands with a kitchen towel when he stopped short.

"Where?" he asked immediately, and she knew she would have to tell him now.

"Just outside. In the garden," Anna said. He was holding her hands; she realised she was shaking. "Just… a shadow of someone, when the lightning-"

"Are you sure?" John moved to look through the window. Another lightning bolt slashed across the sky. She couldn't see anyone there anymore.

"I… No. I think I saw someone, but maybe I didn't," she knew she didn't sound very certain, but she had definitely seen _something_, just by the tree.

"I'll go check anyway," John said resolutely. His steps were fast, even if he didn't have his cane now. Before she could protest, he unlocked the door and went out.

She wrung her trembling hands as she followed him with her eyes, watching as he quickly traced down the path to their garden and inspected the bushes and trees. It wasn't very big, so it didn't take long for him to come back in, but she drew a relieved breath anyway when she saw him entering the kitchen. His hair was dishevelled from sleep and she was ashamed of herself for her silliness.

"Well, I didn't see anyone. Maybe it was a cat," John suggested, keeping his voice as light as possible. It didn't fool her. She knew he was worried about her.

Anna shook her head, taking a step closer to him. He took her hands. "I'm sorry. That was so silly of me. You didn't have to go check. I'm so sorry."

"Don't apologize. There's no reason for it," he said gently, pulling her to him and kissing her hair softly. Her arms embraced his middle. "Are you all right?"

She nodded against his chest, inhaling deeply.

"I just came down for a cup of milk," she explained, letting his warmth engulf her. "The bats in the attic kept me from sleeping."

"I didn't hear anything," he said, and Anna pulled away from him. She smiled, and he looked relieved to see it.

"That's because you were asleep by the time your head hit the pillow," she replied, and he let out a chuckle. "Let's go back to bed."

"Are you sure you're fine?" John asked again, watching as Anna put the pan and the cup in the sink, deciding to wash them in the morning.

She flashed him a smile. She was fine now. She was fine if he was with her.

"I'm fine," she said, blowing out the candle and catching his hand. "Let's go to bed."

He followed her willingly, and only when she was comfortable in his arms and they shared one last kiss before she let sleep consume her, she thought that whatever was outside, it certainly looked bigger than a cat.


	4. Chapter 3

**A/N:** I'll be trying to update weekly, as this story will likely be around 10 chapters long and I have a few finished, but we'll see how it goes and if you remain interested! Please let me know your thoughts - I love reading your theories! I must say, some are in the right track... :) I know some people are worried about Anna but I can assure that after some troubles and issues this story will have a very happy ending - but then it's the journey that counts, doesn't it? ;) Thanks so much for reading!

* * *

_Chapter 3_

"Anna," Mrs Hughes's voice called from the doorway, and Anna looked up from the pair of shoes she had been polishing for the past few minutes. "Have you found Lady Mary's riding boots?"

Anna cringed slightly. "I asked Mr Bates to take a look in his lordship's closet. It wouldn't be the first time they ended up there, so I thought it was worth a try."

"She wants go right after luncheon, so I hope you'll have it ready soon," Mrs Hughes said.

The house had been incredibly busy these days, with several visitors and dinner parties several times a week. If Anna were honest, it was getting a bit too much for her. While she was more than used to these occasions, for the past few years she grew tired more easily, and she longed for the time to arrive when she could just be in her husband's arms, not worrying about the several tasks that lay ahead for her.

"I will," Anna assured her with a smile. Mrs Hughes lingered for a moment at the doorway before entering the boot room.

"You look tired, my dear," she commented with a kind smile. "I'm sure you are glad today is your half day off."

"I am, though I won't exactly rest when we get home," Anna sighed. "We've had bats in the attic. Mr Bates got rid of them and then I convinced him to finally clear out our spare bedroom now that the attic is empty. I'm afraid that when we moved in we just put everything we didn't want there, and we never did work on it later."

Mrs Hughes chuckled. "And I'm sure Mr Bates is looking forward to it as well."

Anna shook her head, joining in her laughter. "That's why we've postponed it twice. He knows we'll have to work on it today."

Mrs Hughes crossed her arms, shaking her head slightly at Anna in an almost motherly way. She still held a smile on her lips. "And do you have any plans for the spare bedroom?"

Anna's heart stopped for a moment but she allowed herself to smile. "Not yet. I think we'll wait and see what happens."

"That sounds like a very good plan, my dear," the older woman said, only to be rushed out of the room by Daisy, talking about some trouble in the kitchen.

Anna was left to her thoughts then, and they weren't bad at all. She felt rather hopeful today. Truth be told, she hadn't let herself think too much on the subject since her hopes were crushed last month, but John never failed to reassure her. He was right, of course. They still had time. She had always wanted to be able to enjoy married life before having children, and they could consider themselves lucky, aside from everything that happened to them - prison, and then her own ordeal. She didn't like to think about it; she hated thinking about whatever time they had apart from each other. They were slowly reaching the point they were before everything, and she was thoroughly enjoying herself, as she felt her confidence grow every time they were together. They could wait a little longer to start a family, but she had absolutely no problem in trying now.

"Found them," John said, and Anna looked up to see him entering the room with Lady Mary's riding boots in his hands. She smiled brightly at this, reaching for them, but her husband had other plans in mind, apparently. He sat down next to her.

"You don't need to do this for me, you know," Anna rolled her eyes as her husband started to polish Lady Mary's boots.

"Nonsense. I like to help you," John smiled, and she knew she couldn't resist to that. "The sooner we do this, the sooner we can leave for our day off."

"And I'm sure you are looking forward to it," Anna said teasingly.

"I'm always looking forward to spending time with you, however that may be," he said, winking at her, and she wanted to be able to kiss that grin off his face. He _really _was quite the orator. "Are you sure you don't have any errands to do in the village today?"

"I'm sure," Anna said with a grin of her own. She stopped polishing to look at him properly. "Mr Bates. Did you just ask me if I wanted to go shopping? Are you feeling quite well?"

"Perfectly well, Mrs Bates," he chuckled.

"Or is that just because you are dreading moving things about? Yes, that's probably it," she teased him. "You do need new socks, but I'll get that when I go to the village for Lady Mary tomorrow. You aren't escaping today."

"I would never want to escape from you, my darling," he said, and she knew that this time he was speaking honestly, not teasing.

She let out a giggle anyway. "You cheeky beggar."

She had big hopes that they'd have as much fun emptying the bedroom as they were having while trying to find a reason to fill it.

* * *

Anna surveyed the room with a smile as she and John took most things out; it was a small, spare bedroom, but it was of no use if they kept using it as a storage room. She wasn't quite sure how they had so many things, really. They had two drawers of items and clothes that were either too old or in need of a renovation. There were two rugs they had been given by Lord Grantham that they had yet to find use for, and a small, hidden part of her hoped they would make a good use of them when the day came that they would move from the cottage.

Thankfully, she had left everything very organized, in case they ever needed anything, and when they got through most things - a few of them would be moving to the small attic, and a very old cabinet that belonged to her late mother-in-law was found to be in a too much compromised state, unfortunately - their little spare bedroom began to take shape, and it looked much bigger than it really was now.

John was sweating from moving things around, and she was not much different. Sighing and resting the broom she had been holding against the wall, she put her hands on her hips and smiled at her husband.

"Well, now this can be a proper bedroom," John said, and Anna nodded. "We just need a bed, that is."

Anna laughed. "For all the guests we keep having?"

He glared playfully at her - their whole life was in Downton, and she wasn't close to any remaining relatives she still had. Indeed, there was never a necessity of having a guest bedroom, but she felt better knowing the room could fit other furniture in the future. Perhaps they could make it a study - a small library for John's books, something like that.

"Not guests," he continued. "Just... Someone else, in the future."

She knew exactly who he was alluding to, or rather she didn't know specifically at all, but she hoped his suggestion would come true.

"We'll wait before we decide to do anything here," she said resolutely. "A few months, like we talked."

"I don't need a study," he quickly said, not forgetting the suggestion she had made a few days ago. "And I certainly can wait, however long it takes."

"It'll be worth it, I'm sure," she sighed. This was as much as she would voice at this moment. She examined the room again. "Well, we should put that cabinet in the corner and leave it there."

John huffed slightly in complaint; Anna shook her head exasperatedly.

"Really, Mr Bates, you don't need to do that if you don't want to," Anna said, but he was already pushing the cabinet towards the corner near the window. He had insisted on doing all the hard work by himself, and she worried he might be putting too much weight on his bad knee. And he still complained, though she suspected he quite enjoyed having her mother him later.

"I want to," he said, but she didn't believe it one bit; her husband was too stubborn for his own good.

And indeed, this one time she had been right. She watched as he walked one step and then another, only to have his right foot catch on a loose wood board on the floor, and she didn't have enough time to catch him; thankfully, in the midst of a loud groan, John leaned against the cabinet and managed to support himself enough so to not fall. The loose board landed on the floor again with a thud, and Anna walked towards John.

"Are you all right?" She knew better than to scold or pity him, knowing how much he hated it all. John nodded, but she could see the pain behind his eyes. "Come on, this is done with. You should sit down for a moment."

"The cabinet-" John started, being his stubborn self, but Anna would have none of it.

"It will still be there tomorrow," she sent him a warning glare. "How's your knee?"

"I can manage," he said quickly, letting go of the cabinet to stand up right. Anna pursed her lips at him. He usually moved around their home with ease, without the aid of the cane, but she was sure this ought to have caused him some pain.

"Do you want your cane?" Anna asked him slowly.

Before long, he nodded.

She turned to get it, which was thankfully just a few feet away, right by the doorway of their bedroom. When she returned, he was examining the wood board that had been the culprit of all this.

"There," she handed him the cane and he smiled at her. "We'll deal with this later. Maybe I could get started on dinner and you can have a bath, see if it helps."

"This damned floor," her husband cursed, and he was met by a stern look from her. He smiled apologetically. "Sorry. Maybe we should think about replacing it."

"We haven't had any other incidents so far," Anna told him, bending down to retrieve the board and place it in its right position. "And the cottage isn't really ours, is it? It doesn't seem fair that we should invest in it more than we already have when in the end we must relie on the kindness of Lord Grantham to not charge us a full rent."

"You are right, of course," he smiled affectionately at her and she did the same, moving to put the board back. Something caught her eye, though. "And we have other plans of our own anyway."

"What's that?" Anna asked, frowning as she reached under the floor for something.

"We have sold Mother's house, you know that," John kept speaking. "And even last week, we mentioned-"

"No, love, I've found something," Anna said, interrupting her husband. She managed to grab whatever was underneath the floor, and it seemed to be a small box. At last, she took out what was indeed a rather small, wooden box. "Oh, my."

"What's that?" John asked as Anna blew some of the dust from it.

"I don't know, but it's not locked," Anna frowned, turning it over. A rose had been painted on it, and it was rather tasteful, though most of the colour had worn off. "And I take it it's not yours?"

John glared playfully at her. "No."

Anna giggled. "Well then. We'll have something to explore later on. Do you think it might be Mrs Turner's?"

John shook his head. "It doesn't seem like something she would forget and leave here. It was hidden. And it looks dated."

"You're right," Anna agreed as she stood up. "And now, dinner. And your bath."

"Are we not opening that?" her husband looked like a disappointed little boy, and she fought the urge to giggle.

"Later. I'll want to take a look at your knee too," she told him softly. She spoke again before John could say anything. "I'll feel better if I do. It might need a massage."

"It's fine, really. I can manage."

Anna pouted, starting to walk away. "There goes my plan of working on a proper massage on you. Before we go to sleep."

This seemed to strike a chord with him, for he grinned slowly and this time her giggle was loud enough for him to hear.

"Actually, I think a massage would go rather well..."

* * *

Anna looked up from her reading to see her husband by the doorway, watching her with a smile on his face. She did the same, happy to see him home – she had managed to escape home early as Lady Mary was rather tired from a day trip to York, but John had had to stay on as his lordship wasn't too keen on going to sleep today.

"Would you like a cup of tea?" she offered him as he crossed the sitting room to sit in his usual chair. "I have the kettle on for you."

"No, it's fine," John said, sitting down, but Anna shook her head.

"I've finished mine and I could use the company," she said lightly, already standing up. "Please?"

"Oh, all right then," he said at last, and she nearly rolled her eyes at his tone, fighting a smile of her own. She turned around to go to the kitchen – an adjacent room, separated from the sitting room just by a door. She could hear John sighing as she worked on their tea. "What have you been reading?"

She added some milk to his tea and her own. "Some notes that were in that little box we found yesterday," she answered him, adding a spoonful of sugar to her tea. She decided to add just one more – no one was watching. "There are some letters there too but I haven't got to them yet. It all seems rather dated. I haven't seen any names besides initials so far."

"How very mysterious," John said as she walked back into the sitting room with their cups of tea. He had one note in his hand. "_'My darling, how I long for you. I wait for you in the temple, after luncheon, if you can be spared. J'_. That cannot be a good thing."

Anna laughed, handing him his tea. "Who are we to judge, when we met by trees and gardens during our courtship?"

"That is only because we never had a moment alone," John pointed out.

"And who is to say they did?" Anna grinned, sipping her tea. "I only see the initials 'J' and 'A'. Maybe they are each a John and an Anna. That would be romantic."

"Poor souls, if they were as lucky as we have been on our journey," John joked, and Anna smiled weakly at him. His eyes softened. "But then, we are very lucky."

He offered her his free hand and she took it, lacing their fingers together. "We are."

They shared a smile. Considering everything they had been through, it was indeed the most important thing that they were here, now, and together. Anna reminded herself every day to not take anything for granted – not their freedom, not their lives. More than anything she longed for a quiet future with husband, no matter where, no matter how.

"What else did you find out?" John asked her softly.

"Well, the notes are always signed by the same person, so I'm guessing the person who owned the box was 'A'," Anna started. "There are some letters, but not too many. I haven't checked them all but I suppose there ought to be actual names in there. The notes are always the same. Longing and meeting in secret."

"Do you think they lived here?" John asked.

Anna pursed her lips. "I don't know. It doesn't seem like it. But they mention the Temple of Diana and the courtyard and the gardens. They must have been at the Abbey. Or at least one of them."

"Maybe they were servants and after they got married they lived here," John suggested. "Just like us."

"One more coincidence between us?" Anna joked. "Or perhaps only one of them lived here. That's why we only see one side of things."

"Perhaps."

"Of course that would be awfully sad," she sighed, drinking the last of her tea and eyeing John.

"Not everyone can be as happy as we are," John said, and Anna smiled at him. She picked one letter.

"I think I'll go upstairs," John said, fatigue in his voice. Anna looked at him alarmed but he soothed her with a smile as he stood up. "It's fine, I'm just a little tired. Not all of us can get home so early," he teased her. "Don't be down here for too long, Mrs Bates."

"I shan't, Mr Bates," Anna said brightly. "Be sure to warm up my side of the bed for me."

John grinned. "As always, my darling."

* * *

Anna awoke with a start. Goodness, she was still in the sitting room, and it looked like it was quite late. The letter she had been reading was still on her lap. Fighting a yawn, she picked it up and put it on the table with the other letters. At least now she knew a bit more about their mystery couple from the past – she couldn't wait to tell Mr Bates of it. She stood up, noticing it had started to rain, and stretched herself, wriggling her toes inside her stockings. She should go upstairs, or John would worry if he woke up and she wasn't there.

She walked towards the window, noticing the curtains were just a little open, and thunder echoed in the sky. She took a moment to watch the road outside – all dark and peaceful, it seemed, even with the rain. Mr Chirk's dog was barking again. She rolled her eyes annoyingly, and watched the road some more. She had the distinct feeling that she was being watched for some reason.

The rain let up quite suddenly, and then Anna saw it – the figure of a woman staring right back at her, just across the road. Anna's eyes widened, and she tried to see her more clearly, and she let out a loud gasp. The woman started to walk towards the cottage. She could see her face now – almost a mirror of herself, but with a look of rage on her face. Suddenly, Anna felt as if something was holding her to the floor, making it impossible for her to move. She couldn't breathe.

Anna opened her eyes and sat up, and tried hard to catch her breath. It seemed so real – it was a dream, but it seemed so real. She gasped for air again and looked around; she was in their bedroom, in bed, wearing her nightclothes. John was snoring softly beside her. Her heart was beating hard against her chest and she closed her eyes, taking a deep, slow breath. She hated nightmares – and she especially hated them now, now that she was used to peaceful nights again. She felt incredibly unsettled – it was indeed raining outside. John snored again. Anna shivered and looked at him, deciding to lie back down and try to go back to sleep.

She snuggled against him, wanting to feel his safe arms around her, but she didn't want him to wake up and worry about her. John, however, seemed to sense her closer, and his arm unconsciously reached for her.

"Am I snoring again?" he drowsily asked, and Anna almost cried at his innocence. His eyes remained closed as she scooted closer, and his arms enveloped her fully.

"Just a little," she confessed, and John groaned as she fit her head in the crook of his neck.

"'M sorry," he mumbled.

Her breathing slowed down a little. "It's all right."

She kissed his neck softly, and took a deep breath. John seemed to be asleep again instantly, and Anna closed her eyes. It was just a silly dream. It wouldn't do well to think of these things – she had had way too many bad dreams over the past years and she was willing to put them all in the back of her mind. This one would be no different at all.

But she couldn't shake off the feeling that she was still being watched, even as she was falling into a deep slumber.


	5. Chapter 4

**A/N:** And we're moving along... This chapter is slightly shorter than the others but the next one is longer and quite important... Would love to know your thoughts! I must say, some of you have a good idea of where this is going... almost! Thanks so much for reviewing - I'll reply to them as soon as I have some time. Don't forget to let me know what you think will happen! :) Thanks for reading!

* * *

_Chapter 4_

"What has got you smiling, Anna?" Mrs Hughes' voice woke her from reverie and Anna looked up, only now realising that she was, indeed, smiling.

She had finished early, thankfully, and Anna was really taken by the fact that Lady Mary's current haircut made her work much simpler. Now she was the one who waited for her husband, not the opposite. And since she didn't have much mending to do, she decided to read one letter here. There were quite a few more at home; at first she thought they were just a few, but upon opening the envelopes she learned otherwise. They had been neatly arranged by date, and she was now reading them accordingly. It might have been weird at first, but now it felt no different from a romance novel she had picked up at the library. They now knew their names – Annie and James. Not Anna and John like they had joked, but a bit close as it was. She had yet to learn of their surnames, however – it seemed rather odd that neither of them used them in the letters, not even to sign at the end. She longed to know how their story ended.

She shook her head. "Just this letter I'm reading. Mr Bates and I found a box under the floor of the spare room a few days ago. From nearly ninety years ago, believe it or not, filled with letters."

"My, how interesting," Mrs Hughes said, clearly amused.

Anna grinned, folding the letter neatly once more – they were in perfect state, and whoever kept them surely wanted to keep them safe.

"It rather is. I think they lived here in Downton. Though how they came to be in the cottage, I've no idea," Anna told her. "I think maybe they were servants, actually. I have a feeling she's a housemaid. But I've no idea about him. They're often hiding from the butler."

She added the last bit in a whisper, and Mrs Hughes chuckled at her tone. They were quite alone at the moment, save for Mr Molesley and Ms Baxter, who were talking quietly at the other end of the table.

"So it is a lovely story?"

Anna nodded. "They sound terribly in love, but something seems to hold them back."

"Sometimes it's best to be held back than pushed forward," the housekeeper chuckled.

"That's what Mr Bates said," Anna said softly. "They seem to be quite proper towards each other, at any rate, so we'll see how it goes. I hope they got married and lived in our cottage."

"That is a possibility," Mrs Hughes acquiesced. "If you ever want to know more, you can always check the files for the servants we had here."

"That would be lovely, but I won't go this far yet," Anna told her with a grin. "But thank you."

"It's good to see you showing interest in such a mysterious story," Mrs Hughes said. "Be sure to tell me how it ends."

Anna rolled her eyes. "That is if I ever find out."

Movement suddenly caught her eye and she smiled upon seeing Mr Bates on the doorway, apparently done for the night. Anna shared a look with Mrs Hughes.

"Good night, Mrs Hughes," she said quietly, "Mr Molesley, Ms Baxter."

John did the same, soon following his wife into the narrow corridor that led to the back door. Anna grinned at him and handed him his coat as she put on hers. He then handed her her hat and she eyed him appreciatively, so very happy that it was now time to go home.

"What were you and Mrs Hughes talking about?" John asked her quietly, a knowing look already on his face. Anna didn't meet his eye. "The letters?"

She huffed in mock exasperation, but a smile threatened to erupt from the corners of her mouth. "I was reading one and mentioned it."

"You're becoming quite taken by those two," John commented as they stepped out, a glint in his eyes.

They laced their fingers together and started walking. "I might be. I guess I want to know what happened to them – how the letters got into what now is our home, and whatever came of it."

"You want them to have a happy ending," he remarked.

Anna nodded. "Of course."

John shrugged. "Maybe their children are still around, if they had any."

"Or grandchildren, even," Anna laughed. "I'm not that involved, anyway, think as you will. I'm _not_," she repeated, meeting his glance in the dark of the night. "I'll leave the past in the past. Now, I'm craving some biscuits and a nice evening with my husband."

"We won't have company, then?" he whispered in a most suspicious tone.

"Not a soul but us," she added conspiratorially.

He grinned.

* * *

"Anna!"

She registered her husband's voice and her eyes shot open, but she couldn't really focus on anything in particular. It took her more than a few seconds to see his face, and to realise that the arms that were holding her were his own. She only saw John's attentive eyes on her and relaxed a little, but still felt a sudden panic within her. She couldn't remember what exactly the dream was about, but she felt an agony that she had never felt before. It was difficult to breathe, and she could only remember that she tried to run, run after someone, but something held her back and took her to a different place.

A sob escaped her throat and she pulled John closer, leaning heavily against him on the bed. His palms were drawing soothing circles on her back and she felt him kiss her hair.

"It was just a nightmare," he whispered in her ear, and Anna closed her eyes. "Take a deep breath."

She did as he told, inhaling his scent and feeling a little calmer.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled against his neck.

They had been through this many times before – nightmares between the two of them came and went, but thankfully John hadn't suffered as much as she had in the past few years. Still, they were becoming further in between, and hardly frequent at the moment. It definitely wasn't the same kind of nightmare she used to have.

"There's nothing to be sorry for," John quickly said, pulling away slightly to look at her. "You weren't loud, but you were crying in your sleep. Are you all right?"

Anna nodded. "Yes, thank you."

He wiped the tears from her cheeks. His eyes were silent but questioning as they laid back down on the bed, and Anna leaned closer to him, resting her head on the crook of his neck.

"It was nothing," she told him quietly. "Just a nightmare. I don't remember exactly what it was, but it's gone."

Anna wasn't sure if he believed in her, but she managed to go back to a somewhat restless sleep.

* * *

She was so engrossed in her reading that she did not see John approach her; it was only when he sat on the bed to take his slippers off that she felt his weight on the mattress and looked up. She bit her lip slightly, her eyes darting back to the page in front of her, briefly wondering if perhaps it was time to put it away.

"What's happening with the love story that has you so interested?"

Anna looked up at him, and she was sure she felt her cheeks burn as she tried to come up with a proper answer.

"They are being quite mischievous, Mr Bates," Anna said, ending her sentence with a giggle.

John chuckled. "And they aren't married yet?"

"They are not. And in the Temple of Diana, no less," she added.

"How very scandalous," John said in a bemused tone, settling beside her and eyeing the letter. "Have you found out anything else from them?"

Anna nodded. "She's a housemaid. I've no idea about him," she sighed. "I do wish we could find her own letters, not the ones he sent to her. I feel like she would be more open than him."

John grinned. "I think there has been plenty of openness between the two of them."

Anna's mouth dropped in shock, but she smiled at her husband's suggestion. "Mr Bates!"

He rested his chin on her shoulder and looked at her with an absolutely adorable expression on his face.

"What?" he asked, slipping an arm around her middle.

"Behave," she said softly, still reading the letter. She frowned at an specific part. "Oh, her surname is Nichols! That's useful information."

John chuckled. "If you say so, my love."

"No, really. Annie Nichols," she pronounced the words slowly. "I might take up Mrs Hughes' offer and look at the files."

"Weren't you the one who said you would leave the past in the past?" John's tone held teasing, but she knew him better than that. She put the letter away and managed to wriggle herself out of his embrace. "Where are you going?"

"I am leaving the past in the past. But that's not my past, and I'm curious," she told him, standing in front of her vanity table and opening a small box. "Ah, here it is," she held the necklace in her hands and examined the locket once more. "I believe I've found the owner of this locket."

John frowned from his position on the bed. "You mean Annie?"

Anna nodded. "Her middle name was something with a G, probably. Success at last."

She put the necklace away and went back to bed, a contented smile on her face. John promptly resumed his position by her side and she leaned against him, feeling him kiss the sensitive skin of her neck softly.

"But you'll still want to know what happened to them," John commented after a moment.

"I do," Anna admitted. He pulled away to properly look at her. "I know it's silly. But I suppose that it would make me happy knowing that another couple who lived within these walls lived happily together."

"It's not silly," he assured her, his thumb caressing the corner of her mouth.

"I think maybe he was married when they met," she sighed. "And that makes their story a little more poignant."

John smiled. "We got there in the end. Maybe they did too."

"I hope so," she said, moving to kiss his lips fully. "I do feel for them and their desperate acts."

"Well," John started, gently nibbling at her ear. "As I recall, you've written me far more graphic letters."

Anna giggled. "I knew what I was missing out on when you left me after we were married."

"And I hope it has proven to be satisfactory," he mumbled as she slowly moved so she straddled his hips.

"It has most definitely been so, Mr Bates," she purred as he kissed her neck again. "And thankfully we didn't have write each other so much."

* * *

Anna sighed tiredly as she reached the attics, suddenly feeling exhausted at the thought of how much work she would have ahead of her. Along with the impending summer, came summer clothes, and Lady Mary wanted them at the ready earlier this year. Thus, Anna found herself in search of Lady Mary's trunk, and she was already thinking of the mending and changes she would have to make in the next few weeks. John had said he would try to join her to get his lordship's clothes as well, even if he had yet to request for them, and his worry was endearing – she had always hated the attics and never wanted to spend a minute longer than necessary there.

The air was quite cramped in there, probably a result of the last few sunny days they had, and Anna quickly made her way through the many trunks and sheet shrouded pieces of furniture. She felt a headache creeping up as she looked for Lady Mary's possessions, managing to find them in a corner. She was not sure which one held summer dresses, so she opened one trunk and then another, picking out a few items as she went – she thanked herself for being organized about the ever changing wardrobe of her mistress.

She had successfully separated quite a few dresses and even a few nightgowns when she felt slightly light-headed – a result of the cramped room and overwork, if she were honest. Standing up, Anna walked towards the nearest window – a small one at that, much smaller than the ones they had in the servants' quarters – and opened it. She welcomed the cool breeze into the room, and took a deep breath. She would have to take a powder for her headache later; if she hadn't eaten barely thirty minutes ago she might have blamed it on an empty stomach, but that wasn't the case now.

The attics were positioned directly above the servants' quarters, and there wasn't much of a view from up there; she could mainly see the roofs of the Abbey and if she looked for it she could see their cottage in the distance. Standing on her tiptoes, Anna smiled as she took a look at their home, but the smile dropped when she saw a woman on the road, looking right at her. Anna jumped slightly, not looking away, she squinted but couldn't quite see her face from up here – her hair was blonde and she was wearing loose, white clothes. Nothing that seemed to be in fashion for years, she wondered. The woman continued to look at her, and Anna shivered, despite the sweat that was forming on her forehead.

"Oh, there you are, Mrs Bates."

Anna startled visibly at the voice, jumping around to find Miss Baxter by the door, her smile slowly dissipating as she looked at Anna. She tried to convey her current state of mind, and looked outside once more – only to find the road once again empty. Anna leaned against the wall heavily and closed her eyes.

"Mrs Bates, are you all right?" Miss Baxter was at her side instantly, and when Anna opened her eyes she met the older woman's worried ones.

"I'm fine," Anna found herself saying, "I've just been nursing a bit of a headache. I'll be fine soon."

"Perhaps you should go back downstairs," Miss Baxter suggested slowly, "it's very warm up here. I can take the clothes you've gathered."

"No, I can take them," Anna insisted, but Miss Baxter had already picked up most of the clothes.

"I insist, Mrs Bates," the lady's maid stated, giving her a kind smile. "Mr Bates mentioned you were here for Lady Mary's clothes and I thought it would be good if I went a bit ahead of myself and got things for Lady Grantham. It's a good thing I came up here."

Anna smiled as she followed the older woman out of the attics, not glancing back. "I'm sure Mr Bates would be pleased to know," she commented, then stopped at the door. "Miss Baxter, it would make me very grateful if you kept this between us. I really only have a headache, but Mr Bates will just worry."

Miss Baxter nodded and smiled at her. "You have my word, Mrs Bates."

* * *

Anna looked up as John entered the kitchen, and tried to wipe any trace of tears away, but he caught her before there was anything she could do. She had been reading a new letter again, this time in the kitchen, and she supposed she had grown too fond of these real characters inside these real letters. She had started to save them up a little, because there were only a handful left, but the new developments shook her more than any other.

"He's married," she told John simply as he approached her, "and he says in his letter he's eager to know what is it that she wants to tell him. Oh, John. It'll ruin her."

"I'm afraid it already has, my dear," John said, hugging her close. She knew she was being silly, but she couldn't help but be incredibly sad about their fate, whatever it had been. "Perhaps we should stop reading them."

She shook her head. "No, I need to know what happened now. There's more, you know," Anna said, grasping the letter from the counter once again. "He sent her that necklace with this letter, to match her eyes – and that's not all. His letter was signed this time. Look at this."

John took the letter from her, holding it carefully and reading the words slowly. She bit her lip in anticipation, and her husband frowned before looking at her.

"James Crawley," he said quietly. "Isn't that His Lordship's grandfather?"

Anna nodded. "It is. And I'm sure she'll tell him she's pregnant. They've been gallivanting for weeks! Oh, why did they have to be so reckless?"

John chuckled softly. "They are in love. Or at least she is. And people do crazy things when they're in love," he kissed her cheek. "We both know that."

"Me more than you, you mean," she acquiesced, sighing against his frame. "I'm being stupid, I know. I shouldn't waste my time caring about such people."

"You're not stupid. Not ever," he assured her. "Think about it. We just found out a previous Earl of Grantham likely had an illegitimate child with a housemaid. He wasn't the first noble man to do that, and he certainly wasn't the last," she nodded against his chest, but he pulled away from her. "I hate to see you so upset though. We could go down to the village and have some tea outside. It's not so very cloudy that we wouldn't enjoy it."

She thought about it – John suddenly could move mountains if he wanted, only to make her happy. But she didn't feel like having tea and she didn't feel like going out, not today.

"Let's just stay home," she suggested. "I don't feel like having tea and I'm rather tired. I'd like to help you pack for tomorrow slowly, for once."

"We'll stay home, then," he acquiesced, just as she thought he would. "But no more reading."

"It's a promise."


	6. Chapter 5

**A/N:** Things may be getting creepier... Brace yourselves! Thanks so much for reading - would love to know your thoughts, especially after this last scene...

* * *

_Chapter 5_

When Anna woke up that afternoon, John was still snoring gently beside her, and it was already dark outside. They had packed his suitcase, as he would be spending the next two days in London with his lordship, and both felt they could use a nap. She stifled a yawn and put on her slippers, intending to get started on dinner. It wasn't so dark that she couldn't see where she was going, so she decided to not light up any candles, not wanting to disturb John's sleep. She quietly closed the bedroom door behind her, but before she could reach the stairs the distinct sound of heavy knocking made her jump.

It was coming from the second bedroom. But how could it be? She had checked things downstairs herself before going up, and everything had been locked. It couldn't be anyone.

Another knock. And then another.

Anna looked around. It couldn't be a person, it definitely couldn't. Perhaps it was a bird that got locked inside somehow.

Three new knocks. Anna stepped toward the door hesitantly, not wanting to let this affect her. It made no sense that this could threaten her. It was most likely a little bird – yes, that was it. She reached for the door knob.

"What's the matter?" John's voice surprised her, as did another heavy knock. Anna turned around.

"Didn't you hear it?" she asked in a whisper.

John merely scratched his head. "Hear what?"

"Something's knocking on the door," Anna said, pointing to the now silent door behind her.

Her husband frowned. "I only heard you closing our bedroom door. Do you want me to check it?"

Anna nodded silently, and John moved towards the door – she chose to stand behind him. He turned on the knob slowly and burst it open, and they were met by complete silence. Anna followed him into the room, watching as he checked behind the door. The guest bedroom only held one small cabinet and a rug, and that was it. The window had no curtains and it was closed. Nothing seemed out of place.

"Are you all right?" John asked as he turned to look at her.

"I was sure I heard knocking," Anna told him with pleading eyes. "So sure. I even saw the door shaking. Like someone had been locked inside."

"Perhaps you were dreaming," John offered as an explanation. "Did you enjoy our nap?"

"Yes… Yes, very much so," Anna told him, though her eyes still searched for something – anything – in the room. "I guess I was just dreaming."

But it really hadn't seemed like a dream.

* * *

The words were mingling together before her – so many dates and names, it was quite hard to find what she was looking for. Mrs Hughes had been kind enough to let her go through the records of the servants, which had been neatly arranged by arrival and departure, but it was hard enough even knowing Anne's full name and having worked out the year she came to work at Downton. Before long, Anna stopped at the entries for 1831 – so many servants served this house before her, and there were so many during the last, much more than the number they had now. And finally, she found it.

Anne Caroline Nichols, housemaid. Arrived in April 1832, departed in January of 1834. There was nothing else there – she had been like any other servant that walked through the same corridors and might have sat exactly where Anna was right now. She had everything worked out though – she knew who James and Anne were. Anna was quite sure John would disapprove of her curiosity, and she knew he was worried about her, but she simply couldn't resist knowing more. The story appeared before her and she couldn't do anything about it – she just had a feeling she had to know.

She took advantage of John being away and Lady Mary having a a day out to spend some time in the library, and it didn't take her long to find information about James, the current Lord Grantham's grandfather. It appeared that he was quite adventurous, travelling a lot, and he and his wife had two sons – the oldest being born in 1834, father of the present Earl, and the youngest, father of Mr James Crawley, born in 1837. She wondered if there were any repercussions at the time, but it happened over eighty years ago; it was unlikely that she could find anything about it besides those letters. Considering the fact that James Crawley, the same Earl who claimed to be in love with Anne Nichols, housemaid, apparently remained married and living with his wife until his death, Anna highly doubted the affair had a good outcome. She had read all their letters and they all stopped abruptly in 1834, before Annie had her baby, she imagined. The Earl still appeared to be in love with her and even visiting; Anna was quite sure that Annie had been moved to their cottage once she was dismissed from the household. Perhaps James had still wanted her close. But in the end, Anna didn't know much more than that. She had the nagging feeling that Annie never got to raise her child. Perhaps she died in childbirth, or perhaps the child never survived. There were many possibilities, but none was a happy one.

John was right, after all. Not everyone was as lucky as them.

She thanked Mrs Hughes for letting her check the files and walked towards the servants' hall, hoping to do some mending. She wanted to make sure she would have some free time tomorrow night, when John would be home. As it was, there was a commotion at the table, probably related to the newspaper that was now in Daisy's hands as she read the article excitedly. Something about a fortuneteller touring Yorkshire. Anna merely exchanged a playful glance with Ms Baxter and sat in her usual spot.

"Do you think she could read my hand?" Maud asked eagerly.

"I don't think she does that," Daisy said, her eyes still glued to the paper. "I think she just sees things. And the future. I don't think I would want to know mine," the kitchen maid left the paper on the table. "What do you think, Anna?"

"About what, Daisy?" Anna asked, looking up from the dress she'd begun mending.

"This Mrs Florence Chapman," Daisy replied. "Everybody says she sees spirits and things. And that she can foretell the future. Would you want to see her?"

Anna fought the urge to grin and shook her head. "I like to think my future is in God's hands, or my own, if I can help it."

"But what about spirits?"

"Maybe she could come here and take a look," Thomas groaned impatiently, clearly done with the subject. "I've seen a lady in a white dress walk into the maid's corridor enough times since I arrived here. A house like this must have its good share of ghosts."

Daisy's eyes widened, and the maids stopped laughing. Anna simply shook her head. "Don't listen to him, Daisy."

Thomas laughed, and Daisy was sent scurrying back to the kitchen the next moment when Mrs Patmore called for her. John would have had fun fighting Thomas about ghosts, Anna thought. Why, she had been in Downton for much longer than Thomas and she never saw anything out of ordinary.

Her hand stopped stitching for a moment as she remembered the woman she had seen while in the attics just a few days ago.

But that couldn't have been anything out of the ordinary, she was sure.

* * *

The cottage always felt too cold when John wasn't around, and tonight was no exception to the rule. The sheets were too cold against her skin, and the bed was far too big for her alone. Anna sighed, and thought about reading a bit before bed, but she really was ever so tired. Stifling a yawn, she decided against it, and smiled at the photograph on John's bedside table – a recent photo of them, taken just a few weeks ago. Making herself comfortable and reaching for John's pillow, she lay her head down, wondering if her husband was already in bed, hoping that he was resting and not still on his feet after a long day.

She knew how much he dreaded going away with his Lordship these days – while it was always something they were used to, it seemed to grow trying with each new year, and it was growing harder to be apart from him. Her eyes grew heavy as her thoughts filled with plans for the next day and the next week; she needed to go to Ripon soon, as she had been delaying it for a few days, and perhaps she could invite John to come along. There was a cricket chirping outside the window, but it didn't annoy Anna; it was faint and slow and she didn't mind. Summer was right around the corner.

She was walking down the gallery. She felt his hand on the small of her back and smiled inwardly. He was speaking, his soft voice making him extremely hard to resist. And then she was running. As fast as she could – she had to stop them from taking him. The staircase felt like it would crumble under her feet, her legs carrying her as far as they could. She absolutely had to stop them, they couldn't take her baby from her…

Her eyes opened, and it took her but one second to realise that she was in bed, inside her home. Her breathing was rapid and Anna struggled to control it for a moment. Her face was hot and sweaty and she felt an anguish within her that she hadn't felt in a long time. _Desperation_ – she didn't like that feeling. She hadn't missed it at all.

But thankfully it had been just a bad dream.

* * *

"I trust that everything was fine while I was away?" John asked as they reached home and he untangled their fingers so he could unlock the front door, eager to leave work behind and enjoy some much needed time off.

Anna nodded, entering the cottage after John unlocked the door. She started to take her coat off. "It was fine, yes. Mostly uneventful."

"Mostly?" he repeated, slipping his arms around her waist after they had both shrugged off their hats and coats. Anna closed her eyes, enjoying his warmth behind her. He kissed her ear. "What did I miss?"

"I didn't sleep very well," she confessed, and he stopped to look at her worriedly. "And I keep hearing some noises here and there. It's like there's someone else in the cottage."

John frowned, stepping away to properly look at her. She sighed.

"Someone else? Are you feeling all right, my darling?" his palm caressed her cheek.

Anna felt herself blush and shook her head; she knew what he would think. She wanted to tell him, about the dreams and the noises and the woman she kept seeing but never really seeing at the same time. But she knew what he would say. He would say that she was still adjusting after spending those weeks in prison, or that the attack she suffered was still making everything difficult for her. But it wasn't like that, she knew it wasn't. She felt stronger now. She felt better within herself and she loved the life they were living at the moment. And she felt absolutely fine; a little tired after a few difficult nights of sleep, but other than that she felt wonderful. Still, she couldn't help but think that the dreams and the noises were somehow related - perhaps she was indeed seeing things, or hearing things that weren't there. And that was what scared her.

What if this is a reflex of the traumas she had been going through, some delayed reaction to it?

No, it couldn't be. She hoped it wasn't, anyway. So she smiled, because her husband was home and because she had missed him, so much. They should be able to enjoy a lovely night together without any prying thoughts.

"I'm fine. All the better now that you are here," she said truthfully, deciding to drop the subject for now.

It wasn't important anyway.

* * *

She giggled as his fingertips nudged at her ribs softly, and she couldn't keep herself from laughing and falling from her position on top of him. His chuckle caused the vibrations from his chest to pass into hers, a gentle, intimate touch that she had been missing so much. She loved moments like this, where they could simply forget the world around them and she could feel the warmth of his skin against her own. She was tired, she couldn't deny that, but she didn't want to waste time sleeping tonight.

She gave him a kiss on his neck and sighed against his skin. His hands ran against her thighs - her knees positioned on either side of his, their very naked skin meeting in places that were already making her melt again.

"I missed you," John sighed, settling his hands on her hips. He squeezed her softly. "I'm sick of going away. Even for one or two days. And I hate it when you have to go. It feels wrong to be here without you."

Anna nodded, remembering all too well the terrible weeks that she spent home without him, without knowing that he was all right in Ireland. "I know. I hate it too."

"Perhaps," he started, hesitating. Anna slowly sat up to look at him. A thrill ran up her spine as he stared at her body, and she felt the hairs on her arms stand up, but it wasn't from the cold, no - the sweat from their previous exertions had dried already and the bedroom was much too warm to let any coldness creep in. John's right hand moved, his fingers tracing her belly button. She let out a deep breath, and he smiled. "Perhaps we should consider moving from here. Work on our future."

Her fingers played with the hairs on his belly, a slight smirk crossing her features. "I thought we were already doing that here."

He chuckled again. "I mean we could start looking, see if the newspapers give us any opportunity. For a hotel. Or a house that could be turned into a hotel."

"How very adventurous of you, Mr Bates," she teased him, his dark eyes boring into hers. "I like the idea. I think it's a good time for us to do that."

"I'll always love Downton," he continued, his hand moving up to cup her breast. "And I'll stay here if you want to. But I think our future is somewhere else. I think you would thrive somewhere else."

His words echoed his concern for her, but she decided to let it go for now.

"We've spent so much time here," she agreed, closing her eyes as his other hand moved down. "Good and bad. But a change would do us good, I think," she felt him twitch under her thighs and bit back a moan. His fingers moved slowly, tantalizingly upon her. "Mr Bates," she called him, her voice low. His gaze shifted from her body to her face. "You naughty boy."

He smiled at her, and she was so happy that they could be like this, right now. "I learned from you, my dear."

She wanted to be able to remember his face, like this, forever. So she kissed him, hard and slow, making sure he knew that teasing wasn't necessary, that she only wanted him, raw and pure, right now. They gasped and kissed like only old lovers would, his hands leaving her to draw her even closer and joining them a moment later. She pulled away to move, to enjoy the feeling of him slipping in and out of her, to savour the sensations he caused inside and out.

"I missed you so much," she gasped after a moment, moaning loudly when she pulled away from him and changed their angle a little. "Try to stay home for a little longer now."

They exchanged a smile, both knowing it wasn't exactly his choice. But he assured her anyway. "I shall try."

And then words were forgotten for quite some time.

* * *

Anna walked up the stairs slowly, singing to herself. It was quite nice when she was able to slip home for a bit in the afternoon; today wasn't her half day off, but her workload was quite light and she had forgotten her buttonbox somewhere around here yesterday. She was sure she had left it downstairs, in the parlour, but it wasn't there, at least that she had seen. Perhaps she had left it in their bedroom. She hoped John would be able to sneak off to have tea in the cottage like he said he would try and they could steal a few moments together away from the others.

A quick search in their bedroom led to nowhere, and she could already hear the teapot whistling from the kitchen. There was only one other room to look in, and she knew John more than often misplaced an object or two while trying to help her tidy their home. Shaking her head to herself, she walked into the second bedroom. It was sunny outside and there were no curtains in this room giving it a warm atmosphere. Mr Chirk's dog was barking. She opened the first drawer of the cabinet there and smiled when she saw her buttonbox, certainly misplaced by her husband.

She closed the drawer, and a much louder noise echoed in the cottage - the room's door was closed, somehow. Anna's eyes widened, gripping her buttonbox - perhaps some air had burst in and caused the door to close. She reached for the doorknob.

It was locked.

She tried again. And once more.

"Oh, please," she said, not sure if to herself or someone else. The room felt smaller each passing second. She knocked on the door. "John, are you there? John!"

She knocked harder, and tried to turn the doorknob again, several times. Tears pricked at her eyes. The banging from the door echoed throughout the cottage, and she could still hear the distant sound of the kettle. She pounded on the door again, she couldn't stop - somebody had to hear her. It was as if someone else was knocking with her, and her hands tingled in pain with every rap. Breathing was becoming hard and she pounded more and more until she finally stopped; the tears fell from her cheeks and she took a deep breath, trembling - John would be home soon, and he would find a way to unlock the door, he had to. Oh, he had to.

And then, from the silence, she heard it, but this time she was very much awake. Screaming from somewhere within the house. A baby crying. Her breath caught in her throat; she felt as if she would be sick.

The sounds grew closer and the door shook, as if someone had been trying to force it. She sat huddled on the floor, the sounds loud against her ears, making it impossible for her to concentrate on anything else. It was maddening, it was terrifying. She thought she might have screamed.

She was going mad.


	7. Chapter 6

**A/N:** I wouldn't keep you waiting too long! Let's find out what happens to Anna... and we'll see John's POV for the first time in the story. Let me know your thoughts - and your expectations for the next chapter! As always, thanks for reading!

* * *

_Chapter 6_

John opened the door slowly, humming to himself. Luckily he had been able to have tea at home but had to bring some mending with him. The whistle coming from the kitchen caused him to frown; Anna was probably busy with something upstairs, so he decided to go to the kitchen and stop it. He was barely in the middle of the parlour when he heard the noise upstairs – cries.

Anna's cries.

His heart raced and he threw his cane onto the settee, not caring what happened as long as he saw Anna safe and unscathed. He tried desperately not to panic as he walked up the stairs, calling her name, hoping that she would hear him. His mind was racing as much as his heart – had someone broken in? Had she seen anything, anyone? He knew that she had been tired but she seemed perfectly fine when she left the house just half an hour ago. The closed door of the second bedroom caught his attention.

"Anna?" he called, panic in his voice.

"No, no, no," Anna's voice was heard from the inside. John tried to turn the knob but nothing happened.

"Anna, it's me," he knocked on the door, incessantly trying to unlock it. They didn't even keep a key in the door. He knocked harder. "Anna, it's John!"

He tried to open the door again. A sniff was heard.

"John?" Anna's voice was small and vulnerable. It broke his heart. "John, oh my God, John. The door won't open!"

"Are you all right?" he asked first, taking a few steps back.

It took her a moment to reply. He stopped breathing until she answered. "Yes, I'm fine."

"I'll break the door," he told her calmly. She was still crying inside the room. "So please stay as far away from it as you can. All right, darling?"

"All right," came her small reply.

It only took him a moment to support his weight on his bad leg and kick the door with the other, and it burst open. He cringed as pain hit him like a knife in his knee but he had no time for that. The door flung open and Anna was in the corner of the room, huddled like a small child, with her nose red and her eyes puffy and tired, and his heart broke for her. She stood up, the tears tracing down her cheeks, and she sobbed heavily when his arms reached her, engulfing her into him, her head fitting under his chin.

They had been having such good days – months, even. Ever since they talked things out and ever since they reunited things were improving and life was almost like it had been before everything. But lately… Something was troubling Anna. He knew he had been pushing a bit when they talked of babies last year but he decided to give her her own time from now on – perhaps that was what was bothering her. Another month and no news. Perhaps he should just ask her what had been bothering her – everything had been so hazy these days, and Lord Grantham's visits to London certainly weren't helping he and Anna and their life together.

"I'm here, my darling," he kissed her hair. "I'm here."

"I came here and the door just… closed," she sniffed against his waistcoat. "I couldn't open it, in any way, and I called for you… And I kept hearing it and it wouldn't stop."

He frowned at her words. "Hearing what, my love? What did you hear?"

She shook her head against his chest. "Just… voices and things. I didn't feel like I was home anymore, I just… And I wasn't dreaming, not this time around. What is happening, John?"

He felt a tightness in his chest as once again he couldn't seem to have the answers to her questions. She was shaking against him, and he simply kissed her forehead and hoped she wouldn't notice that he most definitely hurt his leg while opening the door. He tried to soothe her by holding her close and stroking her back, and her sniffs subsided after a few moments.

"I'm not sure," he replied, "but we'll work it out. All right?"

She nodded against him, and he hoped to God that this time she wasn't trusting him in yet another hopeless situation.

* * *

She was still shaking when he handed her a cup of tea, prepared by him just the way he knew she liked it. Her eyes were still red and she was quiet, almost too quiet. Her eyes focused entirely on the cup as she drank, and he took a deep breath. They would have to talk about it, he knew, but he also knew Anna and he could see that she would rather not talk right now. Alas… it was needed. He touched her arm softly, and she startled at first but brought her own hand to rest above his.

"Anna," he breathed, "look at me, love."

To his surprise, she shook her head.

"Anna…"

"I'm afraid," she blurted out suddenly, still staring at the cup, now nearly empty. "I'm afraid to look at you and see someone else here. I'm afraid I'll hear something, or…"

"It's just me," his words echoed in the silence of the cottage. "Please, Anna."

At his pleading, she did look up. Her hair was dishevelled from the episode upstairs, and her eyes were still somewhat glassy from her tears, but this was still his Anna, looking as lovely as ever, yet still living a nightmare in her mind. She blinked, and pulled him close to her. He rested his cup on the table to hug her, and gave her hair a kiss.

"I see only you," she sniffed, "but I'm still afraid I've gone mad."

"You're not mad, Anna," he said sternly, and she pulled away to look at him. "Tell me what's been happening lately. Please."

"I'm not sure," she confessed. "Just... These dreams and now this. It's all so clear, but I know it's not real. It can't be real."

"What?" he asked again, his mind spiraling to comprehend what his wife was saying.

"The woman," Anna said at last, furrowing her brow as she remembered. "There's a woman, and her baby. I think they took the baby from her."

"Who?" John asked, not understanding. "Darling, I'm sure these are just tricks your mind is playing. There was no one else in the cottage when I arrived," he told her, but she did not seem to think his words were helpful, as she shook her head. "You have been through so much misery and pain, perhaps you're just tired. We should take a break."

"No, it's not like that!" Anna said, "I see her all the time. I've seen her here and outside and... I'm not tired, I'm just so... So happy," she said, touching his arm softly. "Truly, I am. I haven't been this happy in so long but I keep seeing her. What if she's real, John?"

John kept silent. Anna's mind was working faster than his own, which wouldn't be the first time that happened, he thought humourlessly. Instead, he took a deep breath.

"I think it's Annie," she went on. At his questioning glance, she continued, "Annie Nichols. The housemaid. I think she had her baby here and I've been seeing her. Maybe it's because of the letters."

"I didn't think you believed in this sort of thing," John commented.

"I don't," Anna said softly, her blue eyes staring back at his. "I don't and I know you don't either. But if my mind is playing tricks on me, I want to do something to make it go away."

"You need to stop reading those letters and notes," he told her. "I know you sympathized with the story but it's in the past now. We need to focus on the present."

"Yes," she nodded. "Let's do that. I'll hide the letters again, back where they were before. We know the ending couldn't have been good."

He brought a hand to caress her cheek. "Maybe. But perhaps she didn't lose the baby like you think she did."

"I hope not," Anna breathed, and smiled at him. She looked better now. Relieved, and much calmer. She wasn't going mad, not his Anna. He knew she wasn't. Perhaps... This was just a delayed reaction to everything. Or perhaps the story simply reached to her heart and caused her to live through those emotions. She was far more compassionate than anyone would give her credit for.

But he loved her for it.

John smiled. "It'll pass, you'll see," he kissed her forehead. "I'll go back to the house and tell them you're unwell and that I'll have to come home earlier. I'm sure Mrs Hughes and Mr Carson won't mind."

"No, I'll go back too," Anna said stubbornly. "I'm fine. In fact, I think work would be really helpful indeed. To keep me busy."

He wanted to shake his head and stomp on his feet to make sure she stayed home and safe, but she had been just that when he arrived and he wouldn't forget the image of her heartbroken expression when he saw her. No, he trusted her, enough that he would do whatever she wished.

"All right," he chanced a look at the small wall clock behind her. "We have to move soon, I'm afraid. Almost time for the dressing gong. I can wash these while you get ready."

She shook her head. "Let's do them together. And then you can help me get ready quick too. I don't want to be alone."

He smiled kindly at her. "It takes half the time with two, after all."

* * *

The day was nearly over, thankfully; and what a long day it had been. Anna was quiet throughout the rest of it, content to simply work and still dreading the night ahead of her. Still, everything had passed by with no further incidents. She had dressed Lady Mary quickly and though her Ladyship seemed to have noticed Anna's silence, she was glad that her mistress was sensible enough not to raise any questions. Anna simply wanted to work peacefully.

The house was quiet when she left Lady Mary's bedroom, and she decided to go check if John was finished with his Lordship; he had been called shortly after she was, as she heard the gong just as she walked up the stairs, so there was a good chance that he was done now too.

She felt suddenly very tired, and thought that maybe she was due for a dreamless, restful sleep tonight. Taking a deep breath and regaining some hope and confidence, she walked slowly down the corridor. She could hear Madge and Lady Edith talking as she passed by Lady Edith's bedroom, and turned the corner. Their voices ceased, and silence prevailed; it was a calm night and the weather was quite nice. The gallery was dark, save for a few lights. It would be pleasant if they managed to go home a little earlier some day this week. She could use an early night, for once.

Then she heard it. Giggling. And hurried steps.

Anna stopped, and looked around. There were no visitors staying the night, or so she thought. Her heart beat fast against her chest. She was nearly at his Lordship's door now. Just a few more steps. She kept on walking; it was nothing. She could hear nothing now. John was right; it was probably her mind making up things. Anna shook her head, leaving the thoughts behind her, but just as she passed by a door she heard noises again. Steps. She didn't stop walking. And then, a door was opening right by her side. And she saw it.

A woman, decidedly familiar, wearing an old fashioned maid uniform, following a man inside a room. Anna gasped, and blinked her eyes. She stepped back, supporting herself against the banister. The woman turned around to close the door and icy blue eyes stared right back at her. Anna couldn't breathe.

And just then, another door was opened, and her head flew in that direction, but it simply revealed John. She looked back to the door directly in front of her, but it was closed now. She let out a deep breath. It couldn't have been real. She took a step forward.

"Anna?" John's voice called for her, but she simply shook her head and reached for the doorknob. It was a guest bedroom. It was supposed to be unoccupied tonight.

She turned it, ignoring John's steps moving further. She opened the door.

And dark and empty the bedroom was. She pursed her lips. Those eyes looked so real.

"Anna, what is it?" John whispered as he got closer.

She didn't even know what to answer him. It looked too real. It had sounded too real.

"Just take me home," she said at last. "_Please_."

* * *

Anna played with her wedding ring absentmindedly as she sat in bed, not quite in the mood for reading, and the single candle in the bedroom was currently being used so her husband could read - a bookworm if she had ever seen one. She had long given up on reading the book she had chosen from the library just a few weeks ago. _The Turn of the Screw*_ was too much of a gothic novel to have her attention now.

John's hand was distractedly stroking her thigh as he held the book with his other hand; every now and then he would let go to turn a page, but it didn't take long for his hand to cover her thigh over the covers once more. Anna sighed; it seemed almost surreal that they had spent so many years dreaming of living together, of the domesticity their marriage would bring. Simple moments like this made her heart swell with happiness. Despite everything that happened over the years, they were content to lay together, reading or talking or simply resting. She covered his hand with her left one, her wedding ring gleaming against the candle light. She smiled.

"Are you all right?" John asked her, closing his book.

Anna nodded. They had had a long conversation on the way home and she told him of her latest vision. He agreed that things weren't right, but she thought her dear husband was almost afraid to agree that perhaps this was all a trick of her mind; she really might be going mad, and the thought alone made her shiver. She couldn't lose sanity, not now and not ever.

"I'm fine," she said truthfully. She felt peaceful tonight, aside from everything. A little nervous at the prospect of sleeping, if anything. But she had John. That was all that mattered. "I think I'll just get this book back to the library, as I haven't been reading much of it."

John smiled, but his eyes were filled with worry. He eyed the book on her nightstand. "That might be better. The ending is a bit confusing."

Anna pursed her lips. "You said you were looking forward to discussing it with me, when I first chose it."

"It's a ghost story," he said slowly. "It might not be fit for our situation now."

Anna smiled sadly and nodded. "Quite right. I'll just grab something different, like Emma," she suggested, and he chuckled at her implication; she had read the novel more than just a few times, it being her Jane Austen favourite. "I was thinking that... I heard the maids talking last week. About this Mrs Chapman who will be in York this week. She investigates these... paranormal facts. If they are indeed facts."

John frowned. "Do you want to go see this woman?"

"It can't hurt, can it?" Anna asked with trepidation. "What if I really am seeing Annie, and what if she's trying to... Communicate?"

"If she's doing that, she certainly isn't friendly," her husband huffed. "I don't think you should go. She's probably another charlatan, Anna, the kind we read about all the time. There's no such thing as the paranormal."

"I'll either see her or I'll go straight to a doctor," Anna said decidedly. "I need to know what is happening, one way or the other. It's too much a coincidence that this started with those letters. I am either mad or seeing... spirits, if that's the right word. In either case, I'd rather do something quick before I lose my mind. Don't you think?"

He was quiet at her outburst, and she bit her lip. It was probably silly to see this woman, but this might as well be her best chance. And she needed John's support.

"You are right, of course," he exhaled, lacing their fingers together. "I'd like to go with you. When is this lecture, you said?"

"Thursday morning," Anna told him. "I'll have to ask Lady Mary for the morning off, as I usually take the afternoon. But I don't think she'll mind."

"Lord Grantham has an important meeting with investors on Thursday," John said quickly. "I can try to ask him. I could say that you're going to a doctor, or that we have some business to attend."

"No, it's fine. I think... Well, maybe it's better if I go by myself," she said softly. "I can't make you go and see something you don't believe in. And you'll be busy. I'll go, and then I'll be home in the afternoon and we can talk then."

"Are you sure you'll be fine by yourself?" he asked.

Anna smiled encouragingly. "Of course. It'll be fine. Don't worry too much," she reached her free hand to touch his cheek. "I'm sorry about this afternoon. That I made you so worried."

"It's quite all right," he said softly, kissing her forehead. "We should sleep. It's late."

She nodded, a little nervous at what dreams the night might give her.

"If you wake up, for any reason whatsoever," he started, blowing out the candle as she got comfortable in bed, "please wake me up too. No matter what."

"I will," she promised as she settled against his side. She smiled as he looked down at her and kissed her lips.

"Goodnight, my darling."

She breathed in his scent. "Love you."

"I love you too."

* * *

* _The Turn of the Screw_ is a wonderful book by Henry James, and the first ghost story I've ever read, so if you like this genre and haven't read it, I highly recommend it. :)


	8. Chapter 7

**A/N:** So things move up a little in this chapter, but perhaps not in the way you think! I'm actually in the middle of writing the final chapter of this story, and it's been a thrill... Would love to know your thoughts about this chapter, in particular... I'm sure you'll understand why when you read it. Will reply to all the reviews soon - special thanks to Liz and Isis the Dog, you're awesome! :) Thanks for reading!

* * *

_Chapter 7_

"You can't choose to be a clairvoyant," Mrs Chapman's voice echoed through the silent room, filled with many people - young ones and older ones, though most of them were women. Anna listened with attention. "You can't choose to experience such things, and most of the time you'll wish you never did. These forces are eternal, and they exist today. We simply must choose which way to follow."

People clapped as the lecture ended, and Anna did the same. She had expected something very different from what she had experienced; Mrs Chapman couldn't be much older than herself, and she appeared to be completely normal. Her clothes were simple yet classy, and her hairstyle was modern, a little like Lady Mary's, and it suited her well. John would have been surprised, she was sure of it, but she was glad he hadn't come. She wasn't sure how open his mind would be to this kind of thing.

Still, she still had doubts. The lecture had been mostly an introduction to all sorts of branches this science, so to speak, had, and Anna wasn't sure if the knowledge alone would help her get through this. So, as the lecture ended and people started to leave, she slowly made her way down the classroom, a little nervous at what exactly she would be talking about. Mrs Chapman had retreated into a door in the back of the room, presumably an office of sorts, and a queue was already being formed outside of it. Anna pursed her lips; could it be that so many people experienced the same things that she had been experienced for a few weeks now?

With a somewhat nervous sigh, she clutched at her bag and made her way to the back of the room, standing a little uncertain at the end of the queue. Women chattered excitedly in front of her. Anna wondered what John would be doing now. Probably having lunch, she decided. Her stomach grumbled. The lecture had been longer than she anticipated.

A man opened the door and stepped out.

"Mrs Chapman will not attend to anyone today," he announced, and a chorus of disappointment followed. "She does not read hands, and she cannot foretell your future. I'm sorry. Thank you for coming today."

Anna's shoulders fell. She had been hoping to talk to this woman, hoping that she would have any experience to share that might relate to her own. She wasn't sure exactly what it was that she would talk about, but it had given her hope just to know that someone else might have understood her.

The other alternative terrified her, and it threatened her mind at this very moment, as the other ladies in front of her left the queue. She could try to speak to this gentleman, and let him know that she wasn't there hoping for a childish notion of her future. She stepped ahead.

"Excuse me, sir," he was quite a bit taller than her, turning as he dismissed two other women. "I wish to speak to Mrs Chapman, please. I've been experiencing-"

"Mrs Chapman won't be seeing anyone today," he repeated, already setting his eyes annoyingly at two other women who approached him. "If you wish to talk to her, her office is in London and you can-"

"I'd like to speak to this lady," Mrs Chapman appeared behind him. "Don't be too anxious, Edward. You'll scare everyone this way," she told the man with a smirk on her face, and looked at Anna with kind eyes. "Come in, dear."

Mrs Chapman was only a little taller than herself, and the office wasn't much more than a little storage room, probably only being used by Mrs Chapman if she ever wanted to see someone. A little desk and two chairs were all that adorned the room, and the man closed the door as more people came to talk to him. Anna sat nervously on the chair as Mrs Chapman suggested and fidgeted her fingers, unsure of what to say.

"I'm sorry about my husband," Mrs Chapman said dismissively, "he can be a little overprotective for his own good. I'm sure you can understand, Mrs...?"

"Anna Bates," Anna said with a smile, accepting the hand the woman offered. Mrs Chapman blinked, her kind dark eyes becoming a little hazy for a moment. "I do understand what you mean, Mrs Chapman," she said softly, thinking of John.

"Call me Florence," she requested politely. "Would you like some tea?"

"No, thank you," Anna said, feeling a little more comfortable now. She took notice of the photograph of a young boy on the desk and smiled. "Thank you for seeing me."

"It is a pleasure to be here. It had been some time since I returned to my native Yorkshire, and I'm happy to help whoever has a problem," Florence smiled. "You said you aren't here for the future. Something has been bothering you."

Anna nodded. "Yes, well... It's either that or I'm losing my mind," she confessed with pleading eyes. "You see, I've found some very old letters in my house and ever since I started reading them, I've been having odd nightmares, and visions."

"You have been through so much, I can see that," Florence's eyes were compassionate. "But you are not losing your mind. Someone is after you," she said gravely, looking behind Anna worriedly. The room was empty when she turned her head. "The woman from the letters. Did you ever find anything?"

"I have her locket," Anna remembered, opening her bag to reveal it. "I found it in the garden about three months ago."

Florence nodded, but did not touch the necklace. "I see. She did not have a happy life, Anna," the woman told her with soft eyes. "She only wishes to be happy."

Anna frowned. "But how-"

"You must have woken her up for some reason," Florence touched her forearm softly, though her voice was calm. "Have you recently moved to your house?"

"No," Anna shook her head. "My husband and I have been living there for about four years. Do you think it is related to the house?"

"Perhaps," she acquiesced, "but it might be related to you. You have something that she wants."

"But what could I have now that I didn't have before?" Anna asked, more to herself than to Florence.

The woman pursed her lips. "You are happy now, aren't you?" Her hand left Anna's arm. "You have many happy days with your husband. You worry about certain things, but that doesn't diminish your happiness," her smile was kind. "People think that I can see their future. I cannot. I am simply sensitive enough to realise their present and their past. I cannot see your future, Anna, but your present is happy."

"Yes, it is," Anna agreed. "I just worry that this will make me go mad."

"It won't unless you let it," Florence advised her. "This soul isn't here for a good time, Anna. You need to find out more about her. I'd like to go to your house," she offered. "I'm worried that this might be more than a connection to a place. But I'm unable to go now. My son is in London," she explained. "He is unwell, I'm afraid."

Anna nodded, her eyes finding the photograph of the little boy once more. He couldn't be more than five years old.

"He looks like a lovely little boy," Anna offered a smile.

"He is, thank you. He has a delicate health, unfortunately. I wanted to bring him with us but it was for the best that he stayed," Florence sounded wistful. "You don't have any children yet, do you?"

Anna thought she already knew the answer. "No. But we want to."

Florence smiled. "I'll be back here in two weeks. Do you think you could come and see me then? I'd like to know more about your situation. And if it isn't solved, I'd like to visit your home. Would that be convenient?"

"Of course."

"Don't let her enter your mind, Anna," Florence warned her. "You have a gentle, open soul and this can make you more vulnerable to her. Don't let her enter your mind."

* * *

"You don't believe her, do you?" were John's first words once Anna told him her encounter with Florence, merely two hours later, at Downton.

Anna's eyes widened and she frowned. "Of course I do. Why shouldn't I? I prefer to believe in that it can be a possibility than to think that I am going mad. Don't you?"

John looked down, ashamed of his words, just as she expected that he would. A sigh escaped her as she scrubbed Lady Mary's boots. Her mistress had decided to go riding today, as it was such a sunny day, and Anna hadn't had much time since she returned from York.

"I believe her. You didn't hear her speak," Anna noted, eyeing him. "You didn't see the way she looked at me. It was like she already knew me."

"And how much did she charge for that?"

"Nothing," Anna told him impatiently. "Don't play smart with me, John Bates. She told me to be careful. She wanted to come here and see the cottage, but her poor son is sick. He's hemophiliac," she told him, as she later learned herself. "She seemed to be such a genuine person. I don't believe she would lie to me. She only saw me, out of everyone else. And she explained so much. It just... It makes sense."

"I don't doubt you," she glared at his quiet tone. "I don't, I mean it. I just wish we knew what to do next. Burn the letters? Hide that locket?"

Anna shook her head. "No. We'll try to figure out what she wants. That's what we'll do," she sighed. They stopped talking as Mr Molesley entered the boot room to get a cleaning product. He smiled at them, and Anna politely smiled back. He left. "I wish Lady Mary hadn't gone riding today. I haven't eaten since I left York."

"You shouldn't have returned so early," John told her quietly. "I can do this for you. Ask Mrs Patmore for something to eat."

Anna shook her head. "No, I'll be fine for a little while. You need to polish those shoes as well. I'll just finish this and then I'll have some tea."

"Are you sure?"

Anna smiled. "I am," she said softly, their little argument forgotten. "I'm thinking we could go look for parish records of births and deaths here in Downton. At least it'll give us a proper timeline. What do you think?"

John nodded. "It sounds like a good plan. We can go to Ripon tomorrow and try to figure it out."

"That's a lovely idea," she said, happy that he was willing to help her. "Florence said we need to understand what we're dealing with, what she wants, before doing anything."

"Let's hope she's right, and this will actually lead to something."

* * *

He had just finished dressing Lord Grantham for dinner when he heard the commotion. His first thought was that something had gone wrong in the kitchen, as that wasn't unusual, but he hurried his steps anyway, trying to keep his mind at ease; surely it couldn't be Anna.

He was walking down the stairs when he was met by Mr Molesley, who was running rather frantically in the opposite direction. The man grew pale when he met his gaze.

John stopped walking for a moment, tightening his grip on his cane.

"Mr Bates!" Mr Molesley said. "Anna, she... She fainted just now."

He felt as if he had just been thrown into an icy, deadly water.

"What? Where is she?" he demanded.

"She's downstairs, I was sent to call for Dr Clarkson as he is here for dinner," Molesley said nervously. "Thomas caught her before she fell, but she hasn't woken up..."

Before Mr Molesley could say anything else, John was running towards the hall. The commotion was coming from the corridor; they had taken her to Mrs Hughes' sitting room, or so he guessed. It took him no more than a few seconds to see her, being laid down on the settee by Thomas, under the watchful eye of Mrs Hughes and a wide eyed Daisy. She looked pale, too pale. His mind was spiraling. Had she eaten since this afternoon? He had seen her in their servants' hall earlier and assumed she had, but he hadn't had the chance to ask her. Had she seen anything else? Had someone done this to her?

"Anna," he breathed as they let him inside the room. Her eyes were closed. "Anna, wake up."

"Go get her a glass of water, Daisy, please," he heard Mrs Hughes say to the maid. He reached for Anna's hand.

Thomas was still standing, looking a little worried. "She fainted when she was walking down the stairs. Nearly fell. I don't know what happened, she seemed fine until a few moments ago."

John nodded, not taking his eyes off his wife. "Thank you, for not letting her fall."

Thomas nodded, or so John thought, as he looked for any signs of consciousness in Anna. She was breathing, yes, but she looked pale and not peaceful enough to be asleep. He should have insisted more on doing the boots for her. She was clearly hungry then. He should have made sure she had eaten before continuing her tasks. He should have made her go home, even for just a few minutes.

"Here it is, Mr Bates," Daisy arrived then, holding a glass of water. He took it.

"Thank you, Daisy," he mumbled, slipping two fingers inside the water and bringing them to Anna's lips. "Wake up, love. Anna."

He added some water to her neck, as it was something that his mother did to him whenever he felt ill, and hoped it would help. After a moment, she moved, frowning before opening her eyes slowly.

"What... What is it?" she mumbled. Her voice was small.

"You fainted," he explained. "Dr Clarkson is here, he'll see you soon. How do you feel? Anna, have you eaten?"

She pursed her lips, accepting the water he was holding. "Just a biscuit a couple of hours ago."

"Anna," he said warningly, but she simply nodded. That was probably it. She would just need to eat something, and she would be fine.

"Excuse me," it was Dr Clarkson's voice now. Mrs Hughes was letting him enter the room. "So you've woken up, Mrs Bates."

She sat up, albeit slowly so. "Yes, I think I just need to eat something, Dr Clarkson."

"She hasn't eaten properly since this morning," John chimed in anxiously.

"I'll have Mrs Patmore prepare her a plate, just a little earlier tonight," Mrs Hughes offered. John nodded as she stepped out.

"I'd like to examine you just in case," Dr Clarkson insisted. "You look more than a little pale, Mrs Bates."

Anna pursed her lips, exchanging a worried look with John - a look that didn't suit him at all. He grew more anxious, especially when after a few questions the doctor asked him to leave the room. He did so, with much doubt, but he had to trust the doctor in this sense.

* * *

He wasn't sure what to say. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to say. Anna was looking at him expectantly, the plate of food and the glass of water untouched for now. He was surprised, that was an understatement. But he was also so, so happy. And judging by the beautiful, hesitant smile on his wife's face, she was also extremely happy. Thankfully, they were quite alone for now; Mrs Hughes had left them after Dr Clarkson was had gone, and Daisy only came in a minute ago to bring Anna a plate full of food. Just as she was about to ask him again, he reached for her hands and kissed her fully on the lips, feeling positively giddy as his wife giggled against his mouth.

He pulled away. "Pregnant? After all this time?"

"I know," Anna laughed again, her eyes brimming with tears. "He says I'm about four months gone."

"So in five months we'll have our baby with us," he smiled, reaching to kiss her again but catching himself. "You should eat. We need to keep you a healthy."

"I _am_ healthy," Anna insisted, kissing him herself, but quickly pulling away so she could give her food proper attention. She had been treated to some very fine Yorkshire pudding and some of the dinner the family would be eating soon. "Really. He says I'm a little underweight, probably, but I just need to make sure situations like what happened today won't be repeated."

"It won't. I'll make sure you are fed," he chuckled, watching as she finally ate some food. She threw him a smile. "How come we didn't notice it?"

Anna took a sip of the water. "I don't know. I suppose I've been far too distracted to think about such things. Which is funny because when we didn't think about it, it happened."

"The main thing is that it's happening," he couldn't stop smiling. A baby - their baby. In just a few months they would have a child. "Did the doctor say anything else? Everything is truly alright?"

Anna nodded as she ate. It took her a moment to reply. "Yes, everything is fine. I just need to be careful and take care of myself, and everything should run smoothly."

"We'll need to make sure you don't overwork yourself," John reminded her, thinking anxiously of the long hours their work required. Thankfully, as a lady's maid, Anna didn't have to carry too much weight and be confined to lifting heavy items she did as a housemaid, but he still worried. "I'm sure Mrs Hughes can come up with something so you won't have to do too much-"

"I'd rather they didn't know," Anna interrupted him, her mind clearly made up. He was a little surprised at her words; right now, he wanted nothing more than to tell everyone he knew that Anna was carrying their child. A male pride, perhaps, he jokingly thought, or maybe just pure happiness. "I like the thought of this being our secret for a little longer. They'll find out soon enough, and Lady Mary will have to know soon so she can start looking for a new maid. But I'd like it if we kept it between us for a few days."

John smiled. It wasn't often that they had such a happy secret between them. He couldn't bring himself to mind, no. The knowledge that they would finally have a child was enough to make him soar with happiness. He slipped a hand over her lower belly, tentatively stroking through the clothes. Anna threw him a playful look.

"The little one can be our secret for now," he acquiesced. He had never been able to deny her. "But you'll tell me if you need any kind of help."

"Of course I will," she assured him. He believed her, completely. She would never do anything to harm anyone, and now she had enough reason to look after herself. "What a surprise this was."

"The happiest we've ever had."

* * *

His eyelids were heavy when he heard Anna's soft giggle, and he couldn't help but smile. He tightened his hold on her and she fit her head under his shoulder, her naked breasts brushing against his chest. He felt her smile against his skin as she walked her fingers playfully over his chest, tickling him ever so slightly.

"What is it?" he asked, though he thought he knew the answer.

Anna sighed. "We're going to be parents. I can hardly believe it," she rested her hand above his heart. "I keep pinching myself."

He kissed her head. "Well, you can believe it. We need to start preparing," he said softly. "Baby clothes, furniture... Looks like the second bedroom will have an occupant at last."

She laughed. "Yes... But the baby will stay here with us for a few months at least. Don't forget that."

"We'll make the most of the privacy we have now, then," he joked. Anna moved against him, resting her head on his pillow and lying on her back. She rubbed her eyes and stifled a yawn.

"No wonder I've been so exhausted," she mumbled, closing her eyes and settling against him again. "And maybe it's just in my head, but I think I look a little bigger today. If that's even possible. I suppose I need to get used to it. I'll be huge soon."

"And more beautiful than ever," he added, and she chuckled against his neck. Her breathing grew even. She was truly tired.

He supposed now was the perfect time to think of their future. He was sure he wouldn't want to be in service whilst Anna stayed home with their child, as he knew he was likely to miss much of the child's development by being away all day. He felt that it wasn't fair to Anna either, to give up on her work and raise a child by herself, when he might be an absent father - and that was the last thing he wanted. No, they would need a plan, and they needed one soon.

For now, he was content to watch her sleep; he was glad that she had been feeling better since she had dinner and he was very happy that the cause of her sudden illness wasn't another of the visions she had been telling him about. John Bates wasn't a religious man, but he prayed to God that she would be better soon - and that if there was indeed someone haunting her, haunting _them_ \- well, he would make sure Anna was protected, no matter what would cost him.

And as he drifted to sleep, he failed to hear the second bedroom's door closing.


	9. Chapter 8

**A/N:** Another chapter, another step closer to discovering everything! Hope you'll like this one - it was especially fun to write. Mr and Mrs Bates are investigating! :) Thanks so much for reading, and please let me know your thoughts and what you think might happen, it makes my day. :)

* * *

_Chapter __8_

He had never been a religious man. He had grown up in a Catholic household, because of his mother, and that only made him grow fond of not following the rules. If there was any specific belief that he might have had, he lost it in Africa, along with any genuine innocence he still held with him. It was only when he met Anna that the idea of religion appealed again; or perhaps a general idea of fate. He was a romantic man, as his wife liked to remind him from time to time, and sometimes he wished he believed that some things could happen for a reason. Still... Every now and then life felt the need to remind him that if there was a superior being, they were far too busy to be able to watch everyone - or perhaps just him and his wife.

Thus, it wasn't that John didn't believe in Anna. On the contrary - he had no reasons to doubt her, and he didn't. But the idea that there was something - _someone_ \- watching them, making Anna feel so badly simply unnerved him. He needed to see it, and he needed to see it to be sure he could fight it. He would always fight for Anna - and now he would fight for the child she was carrying too.

That night, after everything Anna had told him, of her fears and her hopes, they fell asleep together, and he had been more than content to hold her as she rested her head against his shoulder and his eyes had fallen shut thinking about their future. A hotel, just theirs, and their child. Their dream could finally become true, if they acted soon. And as Anna slept peacefully in his arms, he truthfully found himself believing.

He fell into a deep slumber, until he felt stirring beside him, and Anna's moving about woke him from a pleasant dream. He blinked a few times, thinking she had just been moving about the bed - she could be quite quick steal the covers, as years of marriage taught him - and he moved quietly to lay on his back, getting comfortable. His ears were alert to any little noise, but after a moment he decided that Anna had found a comfortable sleeping position, when she didn't move anymore. But then he heard it, very quietly - steps.

John opened his eyes.

It was Anna, walking very quietly, opening their bedroom door. He frowned. He had asked her to wake him if she heard anything, or had any nightmares. She promised she would. Why wouldn't she?

"Anna?" he called into the dark, growing alarmed as Anna didn't reply and simply kept walking. That was odd. In all their years together, Anna had never been a sleepwalker. Although, he could vaguely recall that she had mentioned, many years ago, that she had maybe sleepwalked when she was a very young child, and her father had found her outside their house. A habit she lost soon afterwards, and had never experienced while they were married. At least until now.

He stood up, not bothering to put on his slippers, and walked quietly into the hallway. He knew he wasn't suppose to wake a sleepwalker, but he would have to do that if it meant Anna would be safer and back to bed. His eyes adjusted to the darkness easily, and he saw Anna standing by the staircase, but facing the opposite direction, toward the second bedroom. He approached her; her eyes were closed.

"Anna," he called, louder this time. "You need to wake-"

It all happened very quickly. Anna gasped, her eyes opening instantly as her feet walked backwards - one step and then another. It was like she was being pushed, and he ran for her, as if his life depended on it, when he saw her, in the split of a second, lose her footing onto the stair. He screamed her name. A sharp pain engulfed his knee as he walked faster, and grasped her arm before she could fall down the stairs. Anna launched herself into his arms, a result of his strong pull on her, but it was enough to prevent her from a very nasty fall down the stairs. He hugged her close, but before he could let out a relieved breath, he saw a figure inside the second bedroom.

A woman. And her piercing eyes looked into his soul before she disappeared, right in front of him.

"Thank you," Anna mumbled into his chest. "Oh, John, I don't remember-"

"She pushed you," his tone was even. He could barely believe in what he had just seen. "Anna. She pushed you. She wanted you to fall down the stairs."

Anna was silent. Her eyes held fear - not for her.

For the baby.

It was real.

* * *

Luckily, they were able to go to Ripon the next afternoon together, and with some insisting on John's part, they were allowed to look into the death and birth records of the Parish, with the excuse that they needed to look into some information regarding Anna's family. They knew what year to look for - 1834. And they knew names, but Anna was worried that some things might have been covered then. A pregnancy couldn't have been too hard to hide in such a small village like Downton, especially considering how small it would have been almost a hundred years ago, at least Anna thought so. But Ripon was the parish Downton was under, thus that presented many more citizens. It wasn't customary to have every birth and death registered right away, but when Anna considered that this in some way involved an Earl, she thought it was a likely possibility that they would be able to find something.

John was very serious about this, she could see it now. Ever since last night he had been in a odd mood, constantly watching over her and himself. She was quite sure that, judging by the look on his face this morning, he hadn't slept a wink since her episode at the stairs. She would be lying if she said she wasn't scared herself; she couldn't remember what had driven her to walking into the hallway, and she had no idea what made her lose her balance, but John's words after he grasped her arm had been enough to let her know that it hadn't been a simple accident - she could only hope it hadn't been her fault. She would never forgive herself if something happened to her or the baby, not now when everything seemed to be going so well.

Still, it was an exhausting, long process, and as Anna turned the third page in the very old book, she feared the words were becoming hazy to her eyes.

"I think my grandmother was born in 1834," she said after some time, considering the thought. John looked up from the book he had been checking and smiled; they agreed that she would be looking at birth records and he would be looking for death records.

"Was she born in Downton?" he asked.

Anna nodded. "Yes. You'd have liked her, I think."

They exchanged a smile, and went back to their tasks. John had never met any of her family members; she had lost all her grandparents by the time he came to Downton, and she hadn't been close to her mother for many years now; she and her sister mainly exchanged cards on Christmas. Still, she liked to think that her father would have liked him, and she thought her grandmother would have liked him too. With a sigh, she continued to go through the records, sat in a small chair in the small room. Beth Wilson, Nicholas Hayes... The names were becoming mixed letters to her. So far, no one by the name of Nichols could be found.

And then, she saw it. James Edward Crawley, born on the first day of May.

"I've found a Crawley," Anna said quietly, not taking her eyes off the book. "No Nichols. But I've found a Crawley."

"We knew that Lord Grantham's father was born in 1834," John told her. "Do we know his parents?"

Anna nodded. "The Earl of Grantham and the Countess of Grantham," she said. "It's odd. He never mentions that his wife is pregnant in his letters, and he mentions her occasionally."

"Do you think they took Annie's baby as the heir?" John's voice was quiet. They couldn't afford to be heard. "They had been married for a few years before they had a child. Hadn't they?"

Anna's eyes widened as she realised what he meant. "They were. But they had another child later," she remembered, as she used to hear a lot about Lord Grantham's cousins. "The Dowager Countess said he was his mother's favourite. The youngest, I mean."

"That would make sense," her husband reasoned. "You should keep looking, just in case. You said it yourself, she could have had the baby in June."

"If I did the right math," she said teasingly, bringing her attention to the book again. Only a few names later, however, she stopped. "I've found my grandmother. May Elizabeth Harris," she smiled. She was quite certain that that had been her grandmother's maiden name. But it was the date that followed the name that made her frown. "Born on the first day of May as well."

"What's the matter?"

"There are four children between her and James. The last one was born in June. But she was born in May, and she was registered afterwards, I assume," she sighed. "I guess it's a miracle that she's registered here. Her family wasn't very poor but they were hardly nobility," she joked.

"Yet she was born on the same day as the future Earl," John said teasingly, and she laughed. He was serious the next moment. "Are her parents listed there as well?"

"Yes, both of them," Anna said, reading the remaining information. "Oh my goodness."

"What? Are you all right?" he was quick to ask.

Anna shook her head, her eyes still glued to the book. "She was born in the cottage. _Our_ cottage."

"What?" John repeated, moving over to where she was. He flinched as he walked, a product of last night, of course. Anna had to remember that. He read the content of the page she indicated. "Anna. Didn't you say your grandmother had been the one to secure you a job at Downton Abbey?"

Anna was quick to answer. "She did. She heard from my mother that I was working as a tweenie up north and talked to Mrs Hughes, I assume. She always spoke so highly of Downton."

"Did she know the Earl? The current Earl's father?"

"Yes, of course. Everyone in the village knows and knew them, in some way or other," she replied. John looked at her with wide eyes. "You don't think-"

"I do," John's voice was quiet and resolute. "There's a possibility, Anna."

"But then they would have to be-"

"Twins, yes."

"That is insane," Anna was gob smacked. Surely that couldn't be true. But then, it fit - the cottage, the letters. Even herself.

"That would make you Lady Mary's cousin," John said gravely, but his eyes were twinkling.

"This isn't the time for jokes, John."

"It's not a joke," he defended himself, going back to his own book of records. "It's the truth. There is too much of a coincidence there to be ignored. But we need to find out what happened to her now."

"It seems like you've been dragged into a very odd mystery," Anna said dejectedly. The fact that there was a real possibility that she could be one of Anne's descendants weighted on her. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be," he reached for her hand and caressed it slowly. She couldn't help but give him a smile. "We'll find out about this together. No matter what."

And she believed in him.

* * *

"I hope we have a girl," John spoke from his position, watching her body as if it was growing a little bit every second. Perhaps it was; she was quite sure she felt as if her belly had grown a little since yesterday (or perhaps she just didn't want to admit that she had been feeling that she gained some weight for about two weeks now). She let out a giggle at John's words, and turned her head to look at him. He had propped himself up on his elbow and his other hand met hers on top of her nightclothes, just above the waistband of her knickers. She doubted anyone could tell she was pregnant yet, but she had to admit that she was looking forward to feeling the baby moving inside of her.

"Don't let them hear you," Anna told him teasingly. "We might have a boy."

"I know," he sighed, and she had to laugh at how wistful he had sounded about the fact that they could indeed have a boy. "Don't you have a preference?"

Anna shook her head. She could never choose - a boy would be just as perfect as a girl. She just wanted to see the baby and count all their little fingers and toes and make sure they were in perfect health.

"Why would you rather have a girl?"

John stroked her skin above the fabric of her nightgown. "I'll be happy with a boy or a girl. Incredibly happy. But for the future... I'd want to have a girl so you can have someone close to you, when I'm not here anymore. Don't give me that look," he said once he met her glare. She hated when he talked such things. "Boys will leave home and find girls and create havoc. I know that. I was a boy once."

His tone was playful, but she didn't like it anyway. She shook her head.

"You may have done all that but you loved your mother very much," she said softly. "So we'll raise our boy well and he will visit us, you and me, all the time. That's not to say he won't end up working with us, or something like that," she reminded him, allowing herself to smile. She brought a hand to caress his cheek. "So don't talk like that again. Please."

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, kissing her lips softly. "Are you feeling all right? Did today tire you out?"

Anna took a deep breath. "Not more than other days, no," she confessed. "I enjoyed going to Ripon with you. I always do, no matter the occasion."

They didn't find out much after they learned of the birth dates; they did find out that Annie had died merely six weeks after giving birth, in Downton, but they could find no information about a funeral or burial. They had come to a difficult place, and there wasn't much more than they had already found out that could be easily discovered. The letters were hidden and the necklace hadn't been worn for a few days now. Perhaps they would be left alone now.

John nodded, then watched her with kind eyes. "I'll be happy no matter what, you know that. And that's not to say that we'll only have this one."

She giggled. "Well, it won't be for lack of trying, I'm sure. But being blessed this once is already amazing. Whatever comes next will be an adventure, and we'll think of that when the time comes."

"Of course," he kissed the tip of her nose. "I hope they get your nose," he moved to nuzzle against her ear; she squealed. "Your ears, and your eyes," he continued, then moving to kiss her lips. "And your lips."

He moved to kiss the hollow of her throat and his hands reached her sides perilously, just above her ribs, where he very much knew how ticklish she was. Before he had even touched her, she was giggling.

"Stop," she said, but without any conviction whatsoever, enjoying his touches very much. He stopped anyway, a lovely playful smile gracing his features as he looked down at her. She caught her breath. "You can be so silly, Mr Bates."

He chuckled. "How so?"

"You dream of a child who looks like me, and here I am hoping they take after you," she sighed as he laid back down, hugging her close to him. She looked into his eyes and caressed the crinkles beside them, the ones that made him look so adorable whenever he smiled. "Tall, and kind, and with your lovely eyes," he smiled further, "and your adorable cheeks."

He playfully glared at her, but she could only envision a cute little baby with chubby cheeks and his dark green eyes. She went to sleep with that image in her mind.

* * *

The images were hazy; she could see the stairs of the cottage, candlelit rooms, and sounds of a baby cooing. No, not one baby - two. Then one of them was taken, and she was locked inside a room so she couldn't stop them. She didn't stop them. The baby was placed in someone else's arms, with more poise and luxury, but much less love.

Then she had been taken, and screams were all she could hear. Screams, shock treatment, and cold nights. Such cold nights. Between all these images, a few words could be heard, over and over again.

Anna woke up suddenly, and her eyes were wide open. She was safe, she realised as she moved against John's sleeping form. He stirred. For the first time, she remembered everything so well. She took deep, quick breaths. She remembered everything. She remembered every face and every noise. She wasn't scared. She felt sorry for what she had seen and she felt sorrow for what happened afterwards. But she wasn't afraid anymore. She knew what they needed to know now. The missing piece.

"Anna," John mumbled, blinking his eyes quickly to look for any signs of distress in her.

"I'm fine, I had a dream," she told him quickly. "I think I know what happened to Annie."


	10. Chapter 9

**A/N:** This is our penultimate chapter and the longest so far - hope you'll like it! A lot will be uncovered... and someone is in danger. I'd love to know your thoughts on this one. Thanks so much for all the reviews!

* * *

_Chapter __9_

Anna looked around the empty room, a sigh escaping her as she tried to imagine herself living here. It was quite hard to do so, she had to admit, even as she felt the tiny flutters she had been feeling for some days now; her baby was very much awake and clearly excited about the day out. It was always nice when she and John did go somewhere new, and she was enjoying herself, despite the nagging feeling at the back of her mind.

Truthfully, she didn't think this was... Them. It was a lovely building, that was true. It was new and big, bigger than she thought was necessary. She could hear the waves crashing against the shore from where she was standing, and the sea breeze was indeed very pleasant. She liked the area - Scarborough had become a favourite place of hers ever since John brought her here for the first time, to spend an afternoon off, roughly five or six years ago. They hadn't even been married then. She remembered thinking this would be a lovely place to live. And perhaps it was, but not here. She couldn't see herself living like this, in closed quarters in the corner of a big hotel. She loved the idea of a hotel, she truly did, but she rather wanted some more privacy. Perhaps a little house adjoined to the hotel, just a little place where she could raise their child without being too worried about guests; where she wouldn't have to worry about her child running off and causing havoc in the middle of the lobby, like children were prone to. This was too big for her and John alone too; they would have to hire more people to care for it, and that would be a struggle in the beginning, especially as their child would be too small and she was likely to be with them all day.

In all honesty, Anna couldn't wait, she thought as she lightly rested a hand on her belly. She couldn't wait to meet their baby, and she couldn't wait to live the future they had been dreaming of for so long. It had been nearly ten days since they found out she was expecting, and even though there were times she still thought she was dreaming, she already couldn't imagine anything else. John said she was exaggerating, but she thought it wouldn't be long until it was noticeable to people that she was pregnant. She hadn't really had any cravings, and recent bouts of sickness made her lose some weight, but she thought she was a little... Rounder, already. It was an interesting feeling to think that someone was growing inside of her, that she was nurturing her baby and soon enough their child would be there with them.

She didn't want to crush John's hopes about this hotel, though. He had been very excited after reading the advertisement on the local newspaper, and with Mr Carson's permission he called the proprietor about scheduling a visit. They had been able to do so on their next day off, the one they had been waiting for so they could both go to York. But he was afraid that this building might be sold soon - apparently it was at a good price, and it was best to be safe than sorry. Their plan of going to York to try and find out some more about Annie had to be delayed. She didn't mind, truthfully. She hadn't seen or heard anything unusual for the past week, and she had been sleeping well and, apart from the sickness, everything was just as it should be. They had some history now, they knew how some events happened, if her dream last week was anything to go by.

She believed that Annie had been taken to a psychiatric hospital in York; the Bootham Park Hospital, as she had seen in her dream. She thought a previous Countess had something to do with it, but she couldn't be sure. As things were right now, she was quite sure that one of the babies was indeed her grandmother. She thought that perhaps it was really too much of a coincidence that James' heir was born on that same day, so that was a huge possibility.

Still, to think that this young woman had been separated not only from the love of her life, but also from her two children... It was something that saddened her deeply. Perhaps Annie had indeed decided to leave them alone. She hoped so, but she wasn't sure.

"What do you think?"

John's voice startled her, and she turned from the corner she had been standing in to give him a smile. His eyes looked hopeful, but she wasn't sure if he had liked this building so much.

"It's lovely, and it's in a good state too," she acquiesced. "It seems a little big for us, though. How many bedrooms did he say there were?"

John made a face. "Thirty seven. It is much bigger than we thought," he agreed. "And there's very little furniture. We would have to buy several items."

Anna nodded, walking towards him. "It might be a good price, but we have to consider that we would be spending a lot in the beginning. And we would need to hire some help. More than just two people, definitely."

"Yes. I don't think this is the place," her husband sighed, looking out the window.

"Come on, don't look so disheartened," Anna told him softly, reaching for his hand. "This is only the first we've seen. I'm sure there will be more opportunities for us soon."

"You're right," he relented, a small smile gracing his features. "Do you like the area, though?"

She smiled at him. "You know I love the area. There's something calming about the sea. I'm sure it isn't as pretty in storm days," she added jokingly, "but it is rather nice."

"A lovely place to grow up in, one would say," his voice was quiet and teasing.

A laugh escaped her lips; it was truly so endearing how dedicated he was to the baby even now, having just found out. "Precisely, Mr Bates."

She chanced a look at the beach in front of the building; it was a busy day in town as she could see many tourists around. A good thing to see, for them to know what they should expect. They could try to find hotels in other towns, but anything near York would be too expensive and anything nearby Downton wouldn't see many travelers and tourists. Scarborough was perfect; it was still close enough to Downton that they could visit every now and then, and it was a big enough town that would see many tourists and wouldn't require that they travel somewhere else to shop for the business. She watched with interest as two small boys played on the sand, but it was a white figure that caught her attention. No, it couldn't be. Not here.

She blinked. The figure was gone.

"What is the matter, love?" John asked.

Anna shook her head. "I just thought... I thought I saw something. But there's nothing there."

John looked outside too. Nothing seemed out of place. His smile was strained.

"I'll just tell the proprietor it doesn't fit our requirements," he changed the subject; Anna nodded. "I'm sorry the day was wasted with this."

She looked up at him. "It's not wasted. We need to walk around the beach and it's your turn to buy me a penny lick."

He chuckled. "I'll gladly do that, but only if you share it with me."

"I always do," she defended herself, and he offered her his arm so they could go downstairs and speak to the proprietor.

Perhaps it would be better next time.

* * *

They had managed to get themselves an afternoon off just a few days later, thankfully; they would have to return to the Abbey for dinner, but they could make do with just a few hours. Though the visions seemed to have stopped almost completely, once they were home Anna told John that she thought she had seen Annie in Scarborough. They both decided that a trip to York would have to happen soon; Anna wouldn't voice this to John, but she thought it was odd that she hadn't seen much for the past days when it was clear that Annie was still after her. It left her with an uneasy feeling, one that she didn't like at all.

Still, it didn't suit her when she woke up and had to go straight to the washroom. And once again barely a half hour since they got to work. She could barely eat during luncheon, as nauseous as she was, and Mrs Hughes was looking suspiciously at her while she ate, while John's worried gaze could maybe attract even more attention. After telling Mrs Hughes that she was perfectly all right, just a little under the weather, she managed to go outside for a moment to try and keep the little luncheon she had in her stomach. It wasn't long that John appeared; of course he would have followed her to the courtyard.

"How are you?" he asked worriedly.

She simply shook her head, taking a deep breath. "I've had better days," _and_ _worse_ _too_, she thought darkly, but shook those thoughts away. "I'll be fine."

He pursed his lips. "I hate to see you like this, knowing I'm the cause of it."

She managed a chuckle. "I believe we did this together. Remember?"

He allowed himself to smile. "I suppose you're right," he said. "Perhaps you should stay home. Rest a bit, sleep for a few hours. I can go to York and see what I can find out."

Anna shook her head. "No, I want to go with you. Florence will be in York and you know I want to speak to her," and just as she finished speaking, a bout of nausea ran through her. She supported herself on a crate and closed her eyes, attempting to control the urge of vomiting.

"I won't have you feeling poorly all day in strange places," John insisted. "You know how bad it was when we were coming home from Scarborough the other day. If the smoke was causing that then, how would you feel today?"

He was right, and she didn't like to admit it. She wasn't looking forward to spending the day in York and then having to go through a train ride back to Downton feeling like this. There were some days that she felt better, but today had been the worst so far. She could go home, make some soup, eat some crackers and knit for a little. It was a sunny day and she thought that perhaps spending time in the garden of their little home would be better than walking around York. She had to think of the baby, after all.

She looked at him with some uncertainty in her eyes.

"I can go speak to Mrs Chapman," he offered. "I just need to tell her what we've found out, right? Shouldn't be too hard. I'm sure I can do that after visiting the hospital."

Anna nodded, but before she could say anything she felt the bile rising to her throat and she managed to take a few steps before emptying the content of her stomach. She hated feeling poorly like this; it made her feel powerless, and more often than not, useless. She couldn't do much of anything without being overtaken by nausea, and it was infuriating. John offered her one of his handkerchiefs so she could make herself a little more presentable and she smiled in thanks. A few tears had escaped her eyes and she wiped them furiously.

"I hate feeling like this," she confessed, sniffing slightly. "The doctor says it's normal and I know it is, but I don't have to like it."

"It'll be better," he said, enveloping her into a hug. She welcomed his arms around her, feeling happier already.

Anna sighed. "It's for a good cause, I know."

"Just promise me you'll rest," he requested. "If I manage to be back early I'll go to the cottage. If I don't we'll meet back here. Do you think you'll be all right?"

"Of course," she said softly. "Just promise me you'll speak to Florence. I told her I would come today and I think she genuinely wanted me to."

He nodded, sealing the promise. He had a busy day ahead of him.

* * *

His first stop was at Bootham Park Hospital, though he felt slightly uneasy at the whole situation. Anna had dreamed of it; they had no other reason to believe that this hospital had anything related to Annie Nichols. Still, he had to try, for Anna. She hadn't told him anything unusual lately but he could tell she was worried, and in truth, so was he. They needed to get this done with so they could start planning for the future properly. They had always had time for that, but now that the baby was coming, they would have to hurry.

The hospital was located between Leeds and York; he had to take a bus once he got to York and here he was. It was an imposing building, dating back to Victorian times, and he tried not to think of the horrors it might have seen. If mental treatments were harsh and painful and heartless nowadays, he would rather not think of how it was nearly a hundred years ago. Perhaps it was for the best that Anna had not come, after all.

John entered the building with some trepidation, and he was quickly greeted by a young woman wearing smart clothes, seated behind a desk. He thought about what he would say. Really, the truth wouldn't get him anywhere. He heard a scream from deep inside the building; the young woman seemed not to notice it. He approached her desk.

"Hello," he started, "I have perhaps an unusual request."

"Our only visiting hours are on Fridays, I'm afraid," the young woman said quickly.

He shook his head. "No, it's... I'd like to know if someone was here in this hospital, around ninety years ago."

"Oh," the young woman said, clearly surprised. "I could check the records, but I would have to speak to my superior. Is it a relative of yours?"

"It's, well... A relative of my wife. The name is Anne Caroline Nichols," he said, hoping this would help. "I believe she was here in 1834."

This information seemed to make the secretary curious, as she mumbled something under her breath and left the reception area, disappearing behind a door. Now that was odd. Well, he hoped she would help him in some way. The room was simply decorated and he eyed one of the plush chairs in the corner. He had just been seated when the young woman reappeared, following by an older man, probably a doctor. John stood up.

"I'm Dr Walters," the man told him. John shook his hand.

"John Bates."

"I understand you are looking for information regarding a patient of ours, from a long time ago," the doctor said suspiciously. "May I ask where are you from?"

The question was very odd, but then so was the situation. "Downton, a few miles from Ripon."

The doctor nodded. "Follow me, please."

He did, and found out that Dr Walters was as curious about his visit as the young secretary. He listened to the story with rapt attention as they walked through the corridors of the hospital, passing by doctors and patients and even policemen. Apparently there was an Anne Caroline Nichols who had indeed been a patient here, but her files had been in storage for over fifty years now. It seemed she was somewhat of a legend among the hospital staff; they called her Sad Annie, because she had never had any visitors and the only contact information had been the village of Downton. Anyone coming from Downton would be able to get the information about her.

"We have always had patients that died and no one reclaimed anything," Dr Walters spoke, "but I suppose hers was one of the first cases and there are some peculiarities about her."

"What kind of peculiarities?" John asked as they walked down the stairs.

"She was depressed, which was never an uncommon thing. But she was brought here after giving birth, and she did not wish to be apart from her children," the doctor explained. "She ran away, back to Downton. She wasn't the first to do so, and not the last, admittedly. And when she was brought back, she was already dead. The peculiarities started there. No one reclaimed her body, so the funeral was held here. But she left letters, and I guess that's why everyone has always been interested in her story. She was young and had her whole life ahead of her. Seemed to be a good person. But she was unhappy, as anyone would be if they had her life. If anyone from Downton ever came here, we were supposed to give them access. At least that's what the notes say."

"But no one ever came," John said. It wasn't a question.

"There was a visitor, but they didn't read the files and didn't get much from it," they entered a vast room in the basement, filled with shelves. John followed the doctor as they walked towards another corridor, filled with more shelves. "Here it is."

He picked a box and opened it; it was covered with dust, but not as much as the others around it. He opened it; a few things were inside. Papers and documents, mostly. A few personal items; a comb and a brooch, a notebook, but not much besides that. John picked the folder and started reading Annie's information. So much of it reminded him of Anna: blonde hair, blue eyes, not very tall at all. It was mentioned that she suffered from moral insanity, probably alluded to the fact that she had a baby - two babies - with a married Earl. Along with it came a list of treatments she had gone through in her short stay at the hospital. Another paper had her death record; it stated that she died in the hospital, from drowning.

John frowned. "She drowned?"

Dr Walters. "Rumour has it that she drowned in a lake at Downton, although how we would know today I'm not sure. Conflicting tales tend to swirl around her. Like I said, for some reason, this case was always a source of interest here," he added. "You said your wife is a relative of hers."

John nodded, perplexed at the news. "Yes. We believe she is her great-granddaughter," he revealed. "You said the funeral was held here. Do you know where she was buried?"

Dr Walters seemed embarrassed for a moment. "I can't be sure, but I think she was cremated. It wasn't legal at the time, but we had several patients dated from that time that were cremated. Some ashes are still in the boxes. We don't have hers, however. I'm afraid I can't give you a precise answer."

John turned the page. The list of visitors was empty save for one name, dated a few weeks after Annie's death. It was a single name, but it was enough for him to know what it meant. _James_.

It was likely that James heard of Annie's death and perhaps retrieved her ashes. That wouldn't be officially written as it was an illegal activity in England at the time. But where would it be, he wondered? Could he have taken it to Downton Abbey? But surely the options were infinite, the amount of vases and ornaments that could be found in the house. Still, with little investigation he had made some new discoveries, but the main fact was still that Anna had been right, and that Annie was trying to tell them something.

And that didn't sit well with him at all.

* * *

"How is Anna?" Florence asked as he sat down in the little chair in front of her desk. She seemed to be ready to move again very soon, and he was astonished at how normal she and her husband looked, exactly like Anna had told him. He wouldn't have come if he hadn't promised Anna, truthfully. He wanted to get home as early as possible, but it didn't seem that that would happen anytime soon. "I hope pregnancy isn't being too hard on her."

John hesitated before answering; Anna hadn't known she was pregnant when she met Florence. "She's well, all in all. She wanted to come, but she was feeling a bit poorly today."

"Give her my best wishes," the woman told him with a concerned smile. "I understand that your problem hasn't gone away."

He nodded. "There have been... Strange developments," he frowned as he recounted the facts; he tried not to leave anything out. Not the locket, or the letters, Anna's dreams or visions, not even the fact that they thought she had had twins and that one of them was one of Anna's ancestors. It did not ease his feelings as his anxiousness only grew whenever he looked at the time or thought about everything that had happened recently. "She still has nightmares, and with them we managed to trace what happened to... Annie. The spirit," he said quickly. "She tried to push Anna down the stairs. I fear for her safety. She thinks she's trying to tell us something, though."

"Perhaps she is," Florence agreed. "There was something to Anna that woke her up. I feel like it is related to the pregnancy. It's in her blood, somehow. I saw that before, when Anna was here. It didn't look good."

A knock on the door startled them, and a man's voice, presumably Florence's husband, could be heard. "Flo, we leave in an hour."

Florence nodded, but her eyes did not leave John.

He felt anxious. "But why would she want Anna?"

"It's not Anna that she wants. You mentioned she lost her children," Florence started. "She needs closure. She wants her children. Do you see where I'm heading, John?"

He did understand.

Annie wanted their baby.

* * *

Anxiousness had overtaken him by the time he reached Downton, hours later. His train had been delayed, with some kind of issue in the tracks, and it didn't sit well with him when the sun was setting and he still hadn't reached home. He went straight to work, knowing that Anna was likely there. He hoped to God that she had had an uneventful afternoon and that she was feeling better now in the evening, but he had this nagging feeling that something wasn't right. When he finally reached the house, he had been interrupted by the irritating sound of the dressing gong, and Mr Carson growling at him that he got back at just the right time. He managed to inquire to Mrs Hughes where was Anna, and she told him she was tending to Lady Mary at the moment. That was fine. Everything was fine.

A good half hour later, he was downstairs again, eager to speak to Anna. But she wasn't in the servants' hall, and at his questioning glance, Mrs. Hughes clarified.

"She wasn't feeling well so I told her to go to my sitting room and rest," the housekeeper said with kind eyes. "She was looking a little pale. I told her that perhaps it was best for her to go home but she wanted to talk to you first."

"Thank you, Mrs Hughes," John said honestly. He appreciated how much the housekeeper kept an eye on Anna. "Do you mind if I go there?"

"But of course not," she said instantly, and he turned around in the corridor to reach the sitting room.

The door was closed, so he knocked.

No answer. He frowned, and knocked again. "Anna?"

"Perhaps she fell asleep," Mrs Hughes suggested, having come to stand behind him. "She did look very tired."

He nodded, but he had trouble believing her words. He reached for the knob and opened the door.

The sitting room was empty.

"She's not here," he tried to keep panic out of his tone, but it was hard doing so. He frantically looked around the corridor, hoping to see her - perhaps she had gone to the washroom, or perhaps she felt sick, but it was so unlike Anna to go somewhere without telling anyone first, even if she was feeling ill. And then he noticed it.

The courtyard door was open.

This was exactly what he feared.


	11. Chapter 10

**A/N:** The last chapter! Thanks so, so much for everyone who reviewed and sent me messages about this story. It's been so much fun for me to write it, and I only hope you had fun reading it. I'll be answering a few questions at the end of this chapter and I hope you'll tell me your thoughts on this ending. Remember: it only takes a minute to write a review, and that is enough to make a writer very happy. Thanks to my awesome editor throughout this story, terriejane!

Happy reading!

* * *

_Chapter __10_

For a whole second, John didn't know what to do. Mrs Hughes looked worried. He looked around. She had to have gone out, for some reason. But he couldn't think of why she wouldn't tell anyone. Unless of course... There was a really frightening reason for it. And it didn't sit well with him at all.

"I'll go out and see if I can find her," he told Mrs Hughes, already walking towards the door.

"She has probably gone home," the housekeeper suggested, though he doubted she believed in her own words. "I'll ask one of the maids to look for her upstairs."

He nodded to no one in particular, the cool night air making him shiver ever so slightly. It was a clear night, thankfully. He looked around; no sign of Anna. His steps hurried; he did not have a good feeling about this. Trepidation ran through his blood as he thought of his wife, of their child. He tried to calm down; Anna hated it when he got anxious about something. It was silent. Mrs Hughes was probably right. Perhaps she hadn't been feeling well and decided to go home. But without telling her superior, without leaving a message for him? It was too odd. Perhaps he should look in the garden. Perhaps she had just needed a bit of air. But he knew it was something else. A dark thought crossed his mind.

Annie drowned - arrived at the hospital in York already dead.

The _lake_.

He walked fast, as fast as his cane allowed him. There was absolutely no sign of anyone out this late. He crossed the grounds and called for Anna. No reply whatsoever. He was sweating. Anna couldn't have gone far. Mrs Hughes said she had just been sent to the sitting room. He reached the lake in no time, but it was too dark to see much. The waters were still, save for a few very light waves. Probably the result of insects and birds around. He tried very hard not to panic. He walked towards the pond. The vegetation moved slightly against the wind. He heard an owl in the distance; nothing unusual. John looked into the lake, approaching it as much as he could without falling. He heard Mrs Hughes' voice, calling for him. She had probably found Anna. Relief ran through his body, but just as he was about to reply, he heard the water.

Bubbles of air, reaching the surface. Just a couple. Right in front of the pond. And then, several more.

He froze.

"Anna," he whispered into the night air.

John took off his jacket as fast as he could, and before he even knew it he was into the water. He took a dip, not caring how cold the water was, how freezing it was against his limbs. It was too dark for him to see anything; the moonlight didn't seem to help much under the water. He might be crazy, but he needed to know, he needed to be sure she wasn't there. He went up to get some air and looked around. A noise brought his attention to the side, and he saw it, so fast and so dark that had he blinked he would have missed it. A hand, trying to swim to the surface. A hand that glistened against the moonlight - Anna's hand.

He swam as fast as he could to the place where he saw her. His heart was thumping fast against his chest. He couldn't lose her. He couldn't lose her now, and not ever, not when everything seemed to be going so well. The water was moving from both his direction and where Anna had been. She was fighting, she was a fighter. He knew that. But he needed to make sure he got to her first.

He dipped into the water again, this time seeing Anna's body shaking against the quiet waters. No bubbles were coming from her mouth. He gasped; her eyes were glassy, and he managed to grab her arms. She did not respond to him. _No, Anna, no... This is not how this will end. _

Her body was limp against his, and he could feel the tears pricking at his eyes as he swam them to the bank of the pond.

"Anna," he called. Her hair was everywhere, away from its neat bun. Her clothes were torn up, just slightly. A button was missing, as well as a shoe. She wasn't breathing. He thought he heard steps.

Years in military service taught him a few things, and he made a fist against her chest and pushed once, twice. "Come on, love. Come on, Anna. Come back."

He pressed his fingers against her nose and blew air into her mouth. Her eyes were closed; she looked almost peaceful.

"Come back to me, Anna," he breathed, repeating the motion. His tears fell onto her already wet dress. He blocked her nose again and put his mouth on hers. He heard Mrs Hughes gasp somewhere behind him. More steps could be heard. But this time, as soon as he pulled away, the sweetest sound could be heard.

She was coughing.

"Oh thank God," Mrs Hughes breathed. He did not take his eyes away from Anna. "Call Dr Clarkson, now!"

She yelled at someone in the distance. Anna opened her eyes, and he couldn't help the cry that left his throat. He almost lost her. He almost lost her for good. He pulled her to him, her confused eyes asking him endless questions.

"My darling," he breathed into her hair, planting kisses over her temple. "My God, Anna. I thought I had... I thought you..."

She simply nodded against his neck, and he felt hot tears against his skin there.

"John, I'm s-sorry," she coughed a bit more. "I couldn't swim, I couldn't- I don't remember-"

He shushed her, trying to keep her calm. She needed to be calm and Dr Clarkson would have to see her, to make sure she and the baby were fine. But she was physically alright for now; she was breathing and she was freezing, but he would make sure she had a warm bath once they got home.

She was safe. She was safe for now.

* * *

Anna was taken home by John, even with Mrs Hughes' protests that the Abbey was much closer. She wanted to go to her home, and stay with her husband. When she thought about it, the whole day had been dreadful; she had worried about him investigating these things on his own, her nausea wouldn't go away, and even Lady Mary suggested that she should go home earlier. She simply hadn't been feeling well, and she had been dreading night time, for some reason. She knew why now.

So she insisted on going home and was glad that no one else but Mrs Hughes had seen the scene. John had shrugged it off by saying that Anna had been sleep walking lately, and that seemed to convince her, at least for now. She had taken a warm bath as soon as she arrived, and she insisted that John take one himself, as the cold water couldn't be good for either of them. Dr Clarkson arrived soon afterwards, and examined Anna under the watchful eyes of Mrs Hughes, who had insisted on coming.

"Everything seems fine with the baby," the doctor concluded as he stood up. "You might be a little further along than we thought but not by much. The heartbeat is strong and you should rest tonight and preferably tomorrow, if you can be spared."

"She will be," Mrs Hughes interjected, still in a bit of a surprise after the doctor arrived and the fact that Anna was pregnant was known soon.

"Make sure you drink some ginger tea for the nausea," Dr Clarkson reminded her. Anna nodded. "It should be over soon. Usually it doesn't last more than the first few months and if I'm correct you're over them already."

She let out a chuckle. "It'll be here before I even notice it."

"I think you will notice, dear," Mrs Hughes jokingly added, and Anna laughed.

Dr Clarkson excused himself and Mrs Hughes said she'd accompany him, but not before the older woman looked at Anna with kind eyes. The rules of society and the household hierarchy still weighed on them, but she allowed herself a smile, almost reaching for Anna's hand but refraining herself.

"Congratulations, Anna," the housekeeper said. "It's wonderful news. To everyone."

Anna smiled tiredly. "We think so too."

Their gazes lingered for a moment before the spell was broken. Anna sat up straight against the bed. Mrs Hughes seemed hesitant to leave her alone. "You can go, Mrs Hughes. I'll be fine with Mr Bates, I promise."

"Are you sure? I'll let Lady Mary know I'll be dressing her for the time being, or Miss Baxter. I'm sure she won't mind," she added. "I'll leave you to share the good news with them all, don't worry. You should have told us sooner."

"I rather liked having this little secret," she confessed, biting her lip. "But it's time for everyone to know, I suppose."

Mrs Hughes nodded. "It is. And do tell Mr Bates that he isn't required at the house until the afternoon. Take care, dear."

Anna smiled, thankful that they would have some time off to discuss everything. She sighed, listening as Mrs Hughes was leaving and relaxing a little. Her hair was still damp from the bath and she ran her hands over her lower belly, feeling very happy that the baby was fine too. She didn't dare to think of what could have happened if John hadn't known where to look for her, if he hadn't seen her. She knew she couldn't dwell on it too much, but she couldn't help it. She could have died. Her baby could have died. She blinked the tears away and looked up when she saw the door opening. John looked worriedly at her.

"I heard Mrs Hughes leaving and locked up," he said softly. "Checked all the rooms. Everything is closed and locked."

She nodded, watching as he took off his robe and joined her in bed.

"How are you feeling?" John asked. His tone was quiet.

Her throat felt dry. "I have... I've nearly killed myself and our baby, John," the tears were still threatening to spill. "I'm so sorry."

"No, Anna," his voice was firm, and his hand was warm against her cheek. "We both know you didn't do that. It was Annie."

So he believed in it all. She blinked. A heavy tear escaped her eyes. "I don't remember much, I just remember falling into the water. And being pushed down and down. I felt as if… as if I was her, right there. And my baby was taken from me, and that I couldn't see them," she shook her head violently. "I thought I was going to die, John."

"You didn't, and you're here," he reminded her, gently kissing her forehead. "I think I know what to do to stop her. To make her go away."

"But how?" Anna asked him, pulling away. "We haven't actually talked to her. We don't know what she wants."

"I think we both know what she wants," John said. There was a moment of silence. She did know. But she didn't want to believe that that would be it. "I spoke to your friend. Florence. She thinks we need to reunite Annie with her children."

Anna frowned. While it did make sense, she doubted there was anything they could do about it. "But how? We don't know how she died."

"I do. She drowned, and I think she did that in the lake," John explained to her. "I had access to her information. She was cremated, but her remains aren't at the hospital. That's the current problem. We don't know where she is."

"We know where her children are," Anna said, looking up at her husband. "And they're both at Downton. So that's a good thing."

"It is," John agreed, deep in thought. "I'll have to show you the files and tell you about my conversation with Florence. I've discovered-"

Anna shook her head, placing her index finger against his lips. He stopped talking, and she rested her head on his shoulder, nuzzling against his neck. He took a deep, calming breath, and his hand came to rest above hers, softly caressing the slight bulge where their baby grew.

"I'm sure you have so much to share," she started, "but I want a quiet night with you. Just us. I know you'll look after me."

He didn't say anything and she knew it was because he doubted himself. But in his arms, after such a long, emotional day, Anna felt safer than she had felt in a very long time.

And that was enough for now.

* * *

Anna hurried her steps down the stairs, two days later, passing by Andy and Thomas; they all seemed to take extra caution around her, though she wasn't sure why. She had only just told Lady Mary about the pregnancy, and she was quite sure her mistress would make sure to tell everyone soon, as it meant she would have to find a new maid and Anna knew she wasn't keen on that. She and John would have to tell everyone today at luncheon, but this wasn't why she was in a hurry to find her husband. No, she believed she had a solution to their problem.

At last, she found him outside in the courtyard, polishing shoes. He seemed worried about her, as usual, but a quick shake of her head made him smile. She sat beside him.

"I think I know what to do," she told him quietly. "I think I figured this out."

John looked perplexed. "How?"

"I think it was James who visited her," she told him. He had told her the whole story yesterday, with all the facts he knew, and she had made good use of her free time looking through some files. "And I think he brought her here."

He shook his head. "They said she ran away."

"I don't mean when she was alive. I mean after she was cremated," Anna explained. "She ran away to see her children, but she couldn't. Don't you see? His wife wouldn't have let her, and chances are she never knew where my grandmother was," she said, feeling rather breathless at the explanation. "I think he went to visit her and he found out she was dead, and decided to bring her here. He probably blamed himself for her death. So he brought her here so in some way she would at least see her son grow up. Inside these walls."

John's eyes were questioning. Anna leaned closer to him.

"There's an Egyptian vase in the drawing room," she started, "brought here by the fourth Earl of Grantham. It is said to be cursed. The housemaids can't open it, only polish it. I remember doing so multiple times. It's very heavy and we always thought there was Egyptian sand inside. No one ever opened it."

"And the fourth Earl was James Crawley," John said, understanding what she meant. "Do you think he would do that?"

"Why not?" she asked him. "His wife probably sent Annie to the hospital. He was travelling then. When he came back, she was already dead, but he promised he would bring her back."

"By then May was already adopted by the Harris family, and James, the son, was being raised as a Crawley," he said, shaking his head. "What a mess. How could he let his daughter go like that? Imagine how many lives would have been changed."

"The past can't be changed. We know that," she sighed. "Much as I hate how dreadful Annie's history was, if this is indeed true, I wouldn't even exist."

"That's true," he took a deep breath. "So what do we do now?"

She looked at him with mischievous eyes. "I've got a plan."

* * *

They walked alone, side by side. John insisted on carrying the large package that contained the vase, much to Anna's disapproval, and her hand lightly touch his arm as he walked with the cane. He didn't feel particularly well, carrying a vase that did not belong to him, but Anna assured him they would return it to its rightful place tonight.

It was just their luck that both Lady Mary and Lord Grantham took their time tonight. When Anna was finished, John still hadn't returned, and even though Mrs Hughes told her to go home she waited for him. It wasn't long until the housekeeper retired for the night and asked Anna to make sure they locked up before going to the cottage. It only took John a moment to show up, once Mrs Hughes had gone up. With this, Anna had managed to sneak into the drawing room and take the vase. She prayed the plan would work.

It was cold and she was glad she had decided to bring an extra coat today. She couldn't believe winter was just around the corner again.

It took them a good half hour to reach the village, and it was as quiet as they imagined it would be, now that it was past one in the morning. She felt nervous as they approached the church, beginning to doubt her own plan now. It made sense, however - if Annie wanted her children, then she would have to rest with them. It had to be it that Florence told John about. It had to be this that would put Annie at peace.

She knew where her grandmother was buried, and they went straight there; by another coincidence, she had been buried close to her brother - merely one gravestone away, though his was much bigger and ornamented. Anna took a deep breath and reached for the vase.

"I can do it," John offered, but she shook her head.

"No, I'll do it," he handed her the heavy vase, but not before opening it for her. The night was still. "I hope this isn't cursed as everyone says."

"It's a risk we'll have to take," John said quietly. She could tell he was nervous too.

She turned the vase slightly, and some dust fell onto the ground. Not sand, probably not Egyptian sand either. A cold breeze hit her. Anna gasped; some more dust fell onto the ground of the cemetery. The wind grew harder, and it made the dust fly everywhere. She couldn't be sure, but she hoped this meant something. These had to be Annie's remains - and now she could rest alongside her children. The vase was emptied. And suddenly, very suddenly, she felt as if a weight has been lifted from her shoulders. Anna closed her eyes; she could almost hear the laughter of a mother playing with her children, almost see the beauty of a different life that could have been. And then, it was gone.

"Do you think it worked?" John asked her worriedly, and she opened her eyes again.

The breeze was no more, and the night was still as cold as before. But different. Anna smiled.

"I think so," she told him. "I feel different."

He didn't seem convinced by her words. "Are you well?"

Anna nodded. "I'm fine. I think we'll be fine," she said, then shook her head. "No, I know we'll be fine," she laughed. She hadn't felt as free as this in a very long time. "We'll be alright, just the three of us."

John smiled, then reached for her. She fell onto his arms, feeling warmth invade her body, and felt as if they were ready to dream again. They kissed - a kiss that tasted of hope and happiness. They would have to wait and see how everything would go from now on. But she was confident. John closed the vase again and let her carry it this time around, his hand engulfing hers. They exchanged a look that promised careful happiness from now on and started to walk away. And as they approached the cemetery gate again, a light breeze hit her, bringing with it two simple words.

"_Thank_ _you_."

When she looked behind them, she thought she saw a woman wearing a nightgown, her arms busy holding two tiny bundles, and a smile on her face. When she blinked, there was nothing more there. She hoped Annie had more happiness now than she did in life and her afterlife.

And as suddenly as it had begun, it was over.

* * *

Anna approached the lake with caution, thinking back to the last time she was this close to it. With a deep breath, she shook those thoughts away. This wasn't the day for bad memories; it was all in the past now. Scattered by the wind, gone for good, or so she believed. Actually, she was sure of it.

She looked at the locket she was holding and smiled sadly. In a way, it had brought her good memories. John had loved to see it on her when she wore it for the first time. She wondered if her great-grandparents had had such good memories as well, but it was best not to dwell on it too much. It seemed quite odd that she was related to the Crawleys, and closely related too. She kneeled on the ground. She didn't know why Annie had chosen her - if it had been because of the blood they shared, because of her pregnancy, the locket or the letters; perhaps it had been a combination of things. Or perhaps Annie had even helped in some things - Anna was quite sure the baby was conceived the night she wore this locket. And that was exactly what brought her here.

"Thank you," she whispered to the wind, closing her eyes. It was a cloudy afternoon, with winter arriving quickly. While she hadn't seen or felt or even dreamed anything out of the ordinary, she felt as if she needed to say something, to put her mind at rest at least. "Whatever happened, something was right that night. And I think this helped in some way, so I'm giving it back now," she said softly, resting a hand on her expanding belly. The pregnancy could definitely not be hidden anymore. "Dr Clarkson says there's a chance that there are two babies. But we can't be sure until the birth. I suppose I have to thank you for that as well."

She threw the locket, which was swallowed up by the dark waters of the lake and disappeared from view seconds later.

"I hope you are as happy with your children as I will be with mine," she said at last, with a smile.

Anna stood up, smiling down as she felt the baby - or one of them - move around quickly. With a sigh, she turned around, holding her coat close to her body, not the least bit surprised to see her husband walking down the path towards her. A quick smile from her was enough to appease his mind and before long their fingers were laced together, eager to go back home to enjoy an afternoon off work.

She couldn't regret the letter, the locket, and she couldn't forget Annie's story, nor did she want to. But from now on, she wanted to think of the future and enjoy the present. And much as she knew their garden was in need of attention, they had a nursery to plan - and think of how they would do that when there was a possibility that they would have two babies at once.

She was quite sure they would manage just fine, though.

* * *

_There are a few things that Anna and John couldn't discover, so I'm giving you the answers:_

_1\. The Mrs Harris in the Prologue is the Mrs Harris who adopted May, along with her husband. They lived in the cottage and cared for Annie while she was pregnant, and kept the secret of the twins. When Annie was taken to the asylum, they adopted the baby girl. The baby boy had been taken before, by the Crawleys._

_2\. James, the father, knew May was his daughter, so I think he was the one to make her somewhat close to the Crawleys, enough to give in to her request for a job for her granddaughter, Anna. That means that May knew James, her brother, but never knew they were related._

_3\. The Countess of Grantham at the time, Elizabeth, had Annie taken to the hospital, as she obviously considered her a threat to her marriage and family. That eventually led to Annie's depression and subsequently suicide._

_4\. Since Elizabeth and James hadn't had any children until Annie got pregnant, they needed an heir; when they did have a legitimate child years later, that child would become Elizabeth's favourite child. That would have made her a terribly bitter, sad person. I was inspired to write this by Violet's saying that her mother-in-law could make everything darker. _

_5\. Florence Chapman was inspired by Lorraine Warren, a paranormal investigator. I recommend watching the movie 'The Conjuring' to see how she acted - but only if you like horror movies!_

_6\. Yes, Anna and Bates conceived that first night - but was it Annie's doing? No, it was just nature talking. Practice makes perfect, after all. But Anna is a spiritual woman and I think she would have wanted to thank Annie, if she helped in anyway at all. Now, if there will be twins... then that probably had to do with Annie, but in a scientific way. If that's the case, that is. _

_Any more questions? We still have an epilogue, so I'm willing to answer anything that I can! Don't forget to leave a review and stay tuned to see how their life is, one year after these events! _


	12. Epilogue

_Epilogue_

September arrived quickly, and it was amazing how fast a year could pass by. Summer was different when one spent it near the beach, or so Anna thought, just as she opened the drawing room windows. It seemed more vibrant, more full of life. Or perhaps it had to do with being a first time parent, she couldn't be sure. She kept her ears alert for any sign of distress coming from the upper floor.

She was glad that they had moved when they did; the hotel seemed perfect for their needs, even if it needed some renovation, but the price was too good to let it go. Alas, only the first floor was open for guests, as they still had to work on the top floor, but their first months in Scarborough had gone better than they had expected.

It had been only six months since they moved from Downton, and while it wasn't easy to adjust to a new town, Anna thought they were handling it rather well. Management of the hotel wasn't easy either, especially when she wasn't of much use at first; it had only been a month since she had given birth when they moved. Thankfully for them, they managed to hire a maid, a young woman named Sarah, and a friendly man, Mr Fuller, as their night manager, quite soon after moving in. Anna was more actively involved in the finances, as it was proved hard to balance work and caring for a new house - much bigger than the cottage they had in Downton, and luckily in better conditions than the hotel. Not to mention the fact that they were four now.

It took them a while, but they had been blessed by not one child - but two, at the same time. Lillian was born first, and Clara only a few minutes later. They were small and very healthy - with extremely powerful lungs, they quickly decided. Exactly what Anna had always dreamed of - and John too, as he didn't hide his preference for a girl when they were expecting them. They were curious little things, cooing at their parents and at each other constantly, thriving more every day, growing up before their eyes.

And Scarborough had been treating them well. The girls had been born at Downton, and Anna was glad of that. To have their friends close meant the world to her, and even now Downton was only a train ride away. Their new house was bigger and had three bedrooms, instead of the two small rooms in the cottage. When the girls were older, that meant they could each have their own room. Or, as John liked to say, there was still time for another family member in the future - but if they thought having one baby was an adventure, nothing could have prepared them for two. It was a good thing that they had been given several baby clothes and toys that belonged to Miss Sybbie and Miss Marigold, and even Master George - and Anna had knitted so much during the pregnancy that the babies didn't lack for anything but the second cot they had to buy soon after the birth.

Anna breathed in the salty air and smiled. The beach was merely three streets away, a short walk from the hotel, and they had a park right across the street. Well located, if a little far from the city centre, but she wouldn't change a thing.

After tidying things up downstairs she decided to check on the babies. They usually had their feeding early in the mornings, when John left for the hotel. Old habits died hard after all; he was still waking up rather early, even when he didn't need to. Anna too, but only because of Lillian and Clara, who needed to be fed. More often than not, however, she managed to convince John to spend some time with them in bed every morning, and this morning had been no different. Their little girls had taken after her, however - it was very easy for them to fall back into slumber and they both would usually sleep for most of the day; once they had their very early morning feed and got changed, they would usually sleep until way past 9 - and, Anna was almost ashamed to admit it, sometimes she joined them.

She walked up the stairs with light steps, bringing with her two plush toys that had been downstairs. The third door was their bedroom. She had left it half open before and stopped for a moment before entering the room. Everything was quiet, and she wanted it to remain that way. The babies still slept in their bedroom during the nights; late night and early morning feedings were still happening and both Anna and John thought they were much too young to sleep by themselves - even though they knew it was bound to happen sooner or later.

Anna approached their cots slowly, a little surprised at seeing little Lillian with her eyes wide open; she was usually loud upon waking up. Clara was still sleeping peacefully. They weren't identical twins, even though they both shared Anna's hair and John's eyes. Lillian was slightly taller, and Clara was a little bit chubbier - adorable in their own way. The baby flailed her arms and gurgled when she saw her mother; Anna's heart swelled with joy.

"Good morning, my angel," Anna cooed, picking up the baby and placing a kiss upon her soft curls. Lillian let out a happy squeal when Anna tickled her stomach. "In a good mood today, then. We will wake up your little sister if you keep going this way," she chuckled, touching Lillian's button nose with her index finger. The baby girl blinked and smiled. "We better get started on your bath."

She was still chuckling when she turned around, but a surprised gasp left her lips when she saw her husband looking at them, as stealthy as a mouse. She playfully glared at him, stopping in her tracks. Before she could say anything, however, Lillian squealed, her little arms already reaching for her father; she was her daddy's little girl through and through, whilst Clara was a little more taken with Anna.

"John Bates, you startled me," she said as her husband laughed and held out his arm to get Lillian. A whimper was heard. "And you've woken Clara up."

"I'm sorry," he said as Lillian settled with him. Anna turned around, not the least surprised to see Clara's watery eyes staring back at her. "Well, Lillian woke her up, actually."

Anna chuckled. "Because of _you_," she said, reaching for Clara. "Shh, darling, it's Mummy."

Clara continued to whimper, but Anna was quick to rock her a little in her arms, just so the whimper wouldn't turn into a full cry that could very well reach her sister too, as they were well aware of. The baby rubbed her chubby fists against her eyes and looked at her with wide eyes. Anna smoothed down her hair.

"I know you didn't want to wake up, but Daddy showed up for some reason," she threw John a glance as he approached her.

"If I'm unwelcome..." he started, but Anna quickly shook her head and he gave her a quick kiss, each one balancing a baby. "I came because there was a letter for you in the mail."

"Oh, really?" Anna asked curiously, watching as the girls babbled incomprehensible words in their arms. "From whom?"

"Mrs Molesley," John said slowly, and she almost laughed at the different words. Only a few weeks ago they had attended the marriage of Mr Molesley and Miss Baxter, but it was still quite a surprise the fact that Mr Molesley was a married man now. John carefully removed the envelope from his coat's pocket.

Anna took it, and walked around the bed to place Clara there, against some pillows - the girls were usually vocal about spending time in their cots when they did not need to. Clara sat somewhat firmly now, a new skill she had recently learned, and John repeated the gesture with Lillian. Anna tore the envelope open, curious about what Mrs Molesley could possibly want from her. John sat on the bed with the babies, watching intently as Anna read the letter.

"They are fully moved into the cottage," Anna told him as she read, though her smile disappeared soon afterwards. "They've found the letters."

John was now holding Clara, who had clearly become bored of sitting and fell down on the mattress. "What letters?" with a serious look from his wife, he understood the message. "Oh. And what happened?"

"She wants to know if they're ours," Anna explained, exchanging a look with him. "I'll tell her they're not. I won't be lying, anyway."

"That seems sensible."

Anna continued to read. "She says that apart from having trouble with bats in the attic they've been fine. You don't think that's related, do you?"

"Darling, we had trouble with bats every year we lived there," John told her softly. "It's nothing."

Anna nodded, and she couldn't help but smile at John, who was now holding both their babies. She shook her head and decided to read the rest of the letter later; surely everything was fine. John was right - it must all be some sort of coincidence. They were away from Downton, building a new life with their babies, and nothing odd had happened in well over one year.

All was well with the Bates family.


End file.
